No More Tears
by mollyt-53
Summary: Ryan and Emily had had their share of pain and loss. Was it time for a new beginning and an end to the tears?
1. Default Chapter

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

A N. I took this story down a while back to rework it a bit and once something is up on fan fic it appears it is impossible to change it. (or it could be operator malfunction on my part ;) Any way it's back for good or bad. Any and all suggestions are welcome.

Ryan stood with Seth and Summer, in the Harbor School parking lot waiting for Marrisa to join them. His head hurt and tension hardened his shoulder and neck muscles painfully. He was back home. He knew he was not the father of Theresa's baby. There had been no baby. It had all been a lie. He was trying to collect the shreds of a life he had barely begun but it was an uphill battle. Marissa was still drinking. She lied about it frequently but he knew. A sixth sense long developed during his childhood made him an expert on drunks and lies. One more year to go but he wasn't sure how much more he could take.

As Marissa approached them, a bright green Ninja slowly drove by and parked at the rail. The rider dismounted. As the rider lifted their helmet a cascade of soft loose red curls fell down across the rider's shoulders. The girl grabbed her backpack and passing the group of friends, made her way toward the building.

**Seth**: Wow, is she ever HOT!

His comment was punctuated by a hard slap to his midsection from Summer.

**Summer**: Cohen! Put your eyes back in your head and quit drooling over that other girl!

**Seth**: Ouch! That hurt! I was merely commenting on her really hot body er.umm... chassis.

Another slap landed in Seth's midsection.

**Seth**: Enough Summer. Can't a man express appreciation for a fine machine without being abused?

**Summer**: The only chassis you need to attend to is mine... got that Cohen?

Ryan and Marissa stood holding hands and smiling at the antics of the other two. Marissa moved closer to Ryan and kissed his cheek as they all moved toward the school building. She was so afraid she was losing him. He was her strength and courage. Without Ryan she had nothing and she was terrified he would leave her.

Ryan smelled the alcohol on her breath and saw its effects in her eyes but said nothing. "Another day in paradise", he thought as he clenched his teeth and entered the school.

Emily quickly found her locker and deposited her jacket and helmet. Collecting the books she would need for her first three classes she closed her locker and began weaving her way through the crowded halls to her first class. Thank God she had taken the time to locate all of her classes so she wouldn't spend most of the day lost in the maze of hallways. She smiled to several kids as she walked and more than a few heads turned to follow her progress.

Seth and Ryan shared the same first hour class. Saying good bye to Summer and Marissa they made their way to the classroom.

**Seth**: Algebra II this early in the morning? Someone has played a dirty trick on us Ryan. It's not normal for

the human brain to think like this so early in the day.

**Ryan**: Seth, what would you know about normal brain activity?

**Seth**: Very funny.. very funny is that an example of Chino sense of humor?

Ryan smiled and punched his friend on the arm as they entered the classroom. Ryan turned to speak to Seth and bumped into someone and he heard books fall to the floor. He turned. A girl was kneeling to retrieve her books. Ryan quickly bent to help her. Both sets of hands found themselves gripping the same book.

**Ryan**: I'm sorry. I wasn't paying any attention to where I was going.

**Emily**: No prob. It was partly my fault too.

As she spoke she raised her head and their eyes met. Ryan felt as though he was falling. Below the crop of red lustrous curls was a set of eyes so green they hypnotized him. They sparkled with intelligence and warmth. She was talking but his ears didn't hear what she was saying. All he could do was look into those eyes.

**Emily**: Are you all right? Hey.. Hello?

**Ryan**: Oh um yeah, I'm ok. Sorry.

Ryan was blushing. His face felt like it was on fire. They both stood up and stepped away from each other. None of this was wasted on Seth as he stood by and watched. He hadn't seen Ryan this way since the early days with Marissa. This could prove to be interesting he thought as a playful smile spread across his face.

**Seth**: Excuse me but my friend seems to have lost his manners. My name is Seth Cohen and you have

already met Ryan Atwood, even if it was a somewhat unorthodox introduction.

Emily laughed as she reached out to take Seth's offered hand.

**Emily**: I'm Emily Tate. Glad to meet you both.

Ryan smiled sheepishly as he extended his hand.

**Ryan**: Glad to meet you, sorry again for being so clumsy.

Not many students were in the room yet so there was several empty chairs. Looking around Seth spotted her backpack at a empty table.

**Seth**: Would it be all right if we sat with you?

**Emily**: Sure. I'm over at that table. I'll be right back. Need to sharpen my pencil.

As the boys made their way to the table Emily looked over her shoulder and watched them. " Maybe this place won't be so bad after all", she thought.


	2. Chapter 2

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

Chapter 2

By the end of third hour Marissa's mind was numb from drinking. She was nervous and she was worried she might have overdone it a little. Concentration was next to impossible. She even felt afraid to speak lest she slur her words.

As she made her way to her locker to drop off her books before lunch, she spied Ryan and Seth in the hall talking to a strange girl. As she got closer she recognized the rider on the motorcycle from this morning. She knew she was in no condition to see Ryan and she should go the other direction but something about the way Ryan leaned toward the girl as she spoke and the way the girl looked directly into his eyes as she talked made Marissa afraid. She headed straight for their little group.

**Marissa**: Hey Ryan...hey Seth

The boys turned to meet her. She hoped she was walking straight. Her smile felt fake and lifeless.

Ryan watched her approach with his teeth clinched. Damn, she was drunk. Not just drinking but drunk. If she got caught there would be hell to pay.

Marissa claimed Ryan's hand in one of hers. She directed her gaze to Emily and extended the her hand

**Marissa**: Hi. I'm Marissa Cooper, Ryan's girlfriend. I don't think we've met.

**Emily**: Glad to meet you. I'm Emily Tate.

Marissa tried hard to focus on this new girl's face. She was pretty enough. Beautiful hair and the most arresting eyes but not nearly as pretty as she was. Marissa knew well how beautiful she was and there were few girls that could compete with her.

**Seth**: Marissa, have you seen Summer? Ryan and I invited Emily to have lunch with all of us, since she doesn't now anyone.

**Marissa**: She should be along any minute.

Marissa continued to focus on Emily and the new girl began to feel uncomfortable. Maybe lunch with all of them wasn't a good idea. All of a sudden she didn't feel very welcome. Before she could beg off Ryan took hold of Marissa's arm and pulled her off to one side.

**Ryan**: Hey guys, I'm really sorry but I just remembered something Marissa and I have to take care of during lunch, so we won't be able to join you.

**Marissa**: Ryan, what are you taking about? I don't remember any plans we had for lunch other than eating.

He gripped her arm tighter and spoke through clenched teeth.

**Ryan**: That's because I forgot to tell you. Now come on let's go.

**Seth**: Ryan, see you later, huh?

**Ryan**: yeah, later

Ryan and Marissa made their way down the hall and out of the building. He still held her arm firmly with his hand. Seth knew what was going on. He felt miserable at his inability to help Ryan.

**Seth**: umm.. sorry about that Emily. Summer will be along here any minute and then the three of us can see if the food is still as bad as it was last year.

**Emily**: That's ok Seth. On second thought I had a really big breakfast and I 'm not very hungry. Maybe we can all have lunch another time, ok? I think I'll just go to the library and study. See ya later.

Seth watched her walk down the hall. Yes she did indeed have a "hot chassis" but there was much more to her than that and for some reason he felt this was going to be a very interesting school year. He turned as he heard his name called. Summer came up beside him and brushed his lips with a soft kiss.

**Summer**: Where is Coop and Ryan?

**Seth**: umm. Ryan said they had a pressing engagement and to eat without them. I can't imagine anything that could be more enticing than dining at Chez Salmonella but you know how Ryan can be.

Rolling her eyes Summer led the way to the cafeteria.

Ryan abruptly stopped when they reached Marissa's car. He turned toward her and leaned into her face. His eyes were blue ice.

**Ryan**: You are drunk! How could you risk everything like this. I've known you were still drinking and you were lying to me but I just kept thinking you would work it out. That you just had to get over the hump. Damn me for the fool I am!

Tears flowed down Marissa's face. She reached out to pull Ryan into her embrace but he pushed away her arms.

**Marissa**: Ryan, please. Don't be mad. I'm sorry. I am trying, I really am. It's just so hard. I love you. Please don't be angry.

Marissa's sobbed convulsively and slowly fell to her knees in front of Ryan.

**Marissa**: Please don't leave me Ryan. I need you. I can do it if I have you.

Ryan looked down. What could he do. He didn't know if he still loved her but there was still some kind of feelings for her. They had been through so much together, he couldn't turn away from her now.

**Ryan**: I'm not going anywhere right now Marissa but I told you long ago I won't go through this again. I spent my entire childhood being a nursemaid to a drunken mother. I have a chance to have a normal life. I will not go back to being a nursemaid for another drunk. I will not! I will help you anyway I can but you have to quit drinking if we are to have any future at all.

**Marissa**: I will, I will Ryan... I love you... I need you

Marissa's sobbing continued as Ryan helped her into the car and drove her home. No one was home so he helped her to bed.

**Ryan**: I'll bring your car back after school. Get some rest and we'll talk more later.

He leaned over and kissed her gently on the forehead as sleep claimed her. He stood for a moment just watching her." My God she is so beautiful", he thought. He kissed her softly on the lips and left.


	3. Chapter 3

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

Chapter 3

Emily pulled into the garage only to discover no one else was home. Entering the kitchen she checked for notes on the frig then made her way to her room. The house was far nicer than any other she had ever lived in was. It made her feel somewhat intimidated but then maybe that was just because everything was so new. She walked into her room and the first thing she saw was the picture. Four smiling faces looked back at her, one almost identical to her own but a boy. She walked to the picture, picked it up and gently touched the faces, tracing each one softly with her fingertips. She pressed the frame to her chest and a sob slipped from her lips. Her mother, father and brother.. all gone. No one left. Taken from her on a beautiful sunny afternoon, where no danger was foreseen or should have been allowed. More sobs erupted and she sat suddenly on the bed, her knees too weak to support her. How long she stayed there she wasn't sure but slowly her sorrow turned to anger and she knew she had to get up.. do something to redirect her feelings.

She put on her running shorts and headed outside.

She began running slowly trying to clear her mind of the thoughts that crowded in but no matter how hard she tried the images came. The car... the blood... the crash.. her brother lying on the highway...She ran faster trying to out run her thoughts but they easily overtook her. He had died in her arms fighting for a last breath of life. Her parents were already gone. How long she sat there holding him she didn't know. The ambulances arrived... the police with their questions, some she couldn't answer because she had been a ways behind them on her bike. She ran faster, her feet becoming a blur... her heart pounding so hard the beats were inseparable. The blood... the death.... the drunk that had caused the accident. There he had sat. Blood streaming down his face, missing an eye but otherwise unscathed. How could that be? Her family was gone... taken away by this man, this demon.

She could run no more. She collapsed on a deserted stretch of beach and salted the sand with her tears.

It was dark when she awakened. Disoriented, she sat up and looked stupidly around. It came back to het and she slowly rose and made her way home.

Ryan unloaded his bike from the back of the truck. He silently let himself in with Marissa's keys. He listened for any sounds that might indicate someone was around. Softly he laid Marissa's keys on the table and headed for the door. He didn't want to talk to her. He needed to think.

Marissa cowered, in the shadows, at the head of the stairs. She had heard Ryan drive up and had watched him from the window of her room. She waited now for the direction this situation would take. She was terrified he would come to her room and what might be said but she was equally terrified of what it might mean if he did not come to her. "Please", she silently prayed. "Please don't let him leave me". She watched from her hiding spot as he laid the keys down and silently went out the door. Seeing through a blur of tears she made her way to her room and to her closet. Opening a shoebox and removing the tissue paper she found what she was seeking. "Just a little to help me think", she thought to herself. "I won't drink much but I really do have to clear my mind and think more clearly and I know this will help". Hesitantly she removed the lid and looked into the bottle. "Just a little", she thought as she tipped the bottle to her lips..

At the pool house he paced around the room his mind a spin. Why does this cloud follow him everywhere he goes. Was there no peace to be had for him? Memories of his mother Dawn, drunk, passed out, the men in her life that brought nothing but pain and violence to her and her children. The nights sleeping in unlocked-parked cars so he didn't have to go home. No more.... No more... he would do all he could for Marissa but never again would he feel like that again, for her or anyone else. He knew they needed help, that they could not do this alone and he knew where to fight that help. He, Ryan Atwood, was no longer alone. He smiled and headed off to find his family.

Ryan looked at his family, searching their faces for a clue as to what was going through their minds. It had been a little hard finding the words to begin but soon it was like a dam had burst and the words had flowed out of his mouth. He felt as though a huge weight had been lifted from his young shoulders and had be divided amongst his family. "God how had he ever lived without them," he thought as Kristen enveloped him in a warm hug.

**Sandy**: I can't imagine how this has gone undetected for so long but Marissa needs professional help and she needs it now. I understand your desire to avoid Julie, but she and Jimmy are her parents and she is a minor so they'll need to be involved.

Ryan understood that, even if he didn't like it. The thought of dealing with Julie Nichol was not at all pleasant. He knew this would be a long hard process and he hoped with all his strength he was strong enough to see it through. He continued to study his hands for a moment more then raised questioning eyes to meet Sandy's.

Ryan: Where do we start?

**Sandy**: The first step will be to get Julie and jimmy involved. Marissa needs to tell them. I know it will be difficult and I am willing to be there with the two of you, if you would like.

Relief flooded through Ryan's body and again he thought, "how did I ever make it without them". It wasn't late so Ryan dialed Marissa's cell phone. He let it ring for almost a minute but no one answered. He mentally debated going to her house but the fear of a confrontation with Julie kept him from it. It would do no good to have a defensive Julie Nichol to cope with. Tomorrow would have to be soon enough. His head still ached and his feet felt like lead. He decided turning in early was exactly what he needed.

**Ryan**: Marissa isn't answering. I'll talk to her tomorrow... think I'll hit the sack.

Kirsten hugged him tightly and kissed his cheek. She seemed trying to lend him her strength and he gratefully hugged her back. Sandy engulfed both of them in his arms and they stayed that way for a time just feeling the closeness.

**Kirsten**: Night hon. It will be all right.

**Sandy:** Night son. We are with you.

Ryan entered the pool house and shuffled to the bed. He lay down, closed his eyes and know no more until his alarm signaled the start of another day.

At the Nichol house, a drunken Marissa lay passed out on her bed. She still wore the same clothes she had put on for school that morning. A soft snore escaped her lips but other than that she slept as if in a coma. She was unaware her phone rang and rang or that tomorrow events would be set in motion that would change her life forever.

Seth came awake before the alarm clock sounded. Still lying in his bed he timidly explored issues he buried and ignored in his more alert moments. Since his return he had become increasingly aware that he was not the same boy that had left at the beginning of the summer and he wasn't sure he could fit into his old life again. Nowhere was this more apparent that in his relationship with Summer and he didn't know what to do about it. She harbored guilty feeling about her assumed role in his running away and she constantly sought out ways to "make it up to him". The more she tried to hold him, the more he seemed to want to move away. Before he left he had been consumed with want and need of her. This evolution was so alien to him, he was powerless to understand it. The sound of his alarm brought him back to the present and sighing he climbed out of bed.


	4. Chapter 4

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

Chapter 4

The usual morning ritual in the Cohen kitchen was more subdued this morning. Everyone felt the weight of the tasks at hand today. When Ryan entered, he found Seth already there munching cereal from the box. Kirsten was pouring thick black coffee into her cup. Ryan shuffled over and helped himself to a cup.

**Ryan**: Morning

**Seth**: Hey Ryan. I thought for a minute maybe you had decided to hide out in the pool house today. Can't say I would blame you.

**Ryan**: Don't tempt me. I'd rather have a root canal than do what I have to do today.

**Seth**: Maybe we could take the boat out and both disappear this time.

**Ryan**: That is an option I don't care to explore this morning..... get back with me this afternoon

Sandy enters the kitchen and snatches a bagel out of Kirsten's hand.

**Kirsten**: "Hey", she laughs swatting his hand.

**Sandy**: Ryan.. Seth.. did you boys sleep well?

**Ryan**: actually I did and I was really hoping I'm still asleep and all this is a nightmare. I better call Marissa.

**Seth**: Ryan why do you persist in being so negative... it is your karma to be masticated by the jaws of life.. tilt your self at every windmill... climb every mountain, swim every sea..

A bagel bounced off Seth's head. Kirsten stood smiling at her son.

**Kirsten**: Want another bagel?

**Seth**: umm.. no thanks Mom, one was sufficient.

Ryan dialed the phone but when a voice answered it was not Marissa. Julie had been straightening Marissa's blankets when her daughters cell phone. She quickly answered to keep it from waking her sleeping daughter.

Ryan didn't quite know what to say.

**Ryan**: "May I please speak to Marissa ", he finally stammered.

Coldness crept into Julie's voice as she realized who the caller was.

**Julie**: I'm sorry Ryan but Marissa isn't feeling well and won't be going to school. You'll need to find another ride.

**Ryan**: Mrs. Nichol, I'm not calling about a ride, I just need to speak with Marissa

There was silence on the other end and Ryan realized she had hung up.

Julie surveyed her daughter's room. The empty vodka bottle lying just under the bed might have escaped her notice if she hadn't bumped it with her foot. She looked at her sleeping daughter's face.

"Marissa, what is going on with you", she thought. She didn't understand her daughter at all. All she tried to do was to give her family the things she never had it seemed no one appreciated her sacrifices. Ever since "that boy" came here there has been nothing but trouble. "She would do what had to be done to save her daughter and no one had better get in her way" she said to no one. She left the room to make some calls.

**Ryan**: Sandy, Julie says Marissa is ill and won't be going to school. When I asked to speak to her , Julie hung up. I have to do something.

**Sandy**: Ryan, maybe Marissa is feeling bad.. too much to drink can do that. Tell you what, we'll call Jimmy, tell him what is going on and develop some type of strategy, then we'll all meet with Julie. You go on to school and call me later at the office.

Ryan had no choice. All he could do was go along with Sandy. He was uneasy and quite frankly afraid. He wasn't sure of what but his instincts told him something was very wrong. He would continue to try and contact Marissa. Maybe Summer would be able to get through.

**Kirsten**: If you boys are ready I'll drop you off on my way.

As Kirsten pulled up to the school a green Ninja pulled into the parking lot. Until this moment Ryan had forgotten about its rider. Now the memory of the new girl came rushing back and he hoped he would get to talk to her again. Seth too, followed her arrival with an approving grin..

**Seth**: Caliente.. What do you think, Ryan. You never really said.

The grin remained on his face and he watched his friends discomfort.

**Ryan**: ummm.. she seemed nice enough

**Seth**: come now Ryan... you all but slobbered down the front of your shirt yesterday. Let me assure you, your composure not only slipped yesterday but also it kicked you in the butt before it left.

A "Ryan glare" only served to throw him into fits of laughter. As they climbed from the car and headed toward the school Ryan glared over his shoulder at Seth but didn't utter a sound.

As they entered the classroom Ryan nonchalantly scanned the room. Seth behind him leaned close and smirked.

**Seth**: Gee I don't see her either

Ryan: See who?

Ryan knew it was useless, that Seth knew exactly who he was looking for but none the less decided to stick to his game plan. They found two empty seats at a table and sat down.

Emily was running late. Her meeting with her advisor had been longer than she had expected. She ran down the hall to get to her first hour class. She had dropped some classes and added some others so now she had hardly any idea where she was going.

She found her room just as the bell sounded and slipped into the closest empty chair. Schoolwork had always come easy for her so she found herself lost in the work and was surprised when the hour was up.

She was starving by lunchtime and as she approached her locker she was surprised to see Ryan and Seth standing by her locker.

**Emily**: hey guys.

**Seth**: we missed you in algebra this morning.

**Emily**: My advisor was able to get me into some classes I wanted but I had to swap a bunch of classes around. Nothing personal, in fact you guys are about the only people that have spoken to me except for the teachers. What is it with this school?

Both boys looked at each other and burst in loud peals of laughter

**Seth**: what is with this school? Emily, you are probably standing with the two most qualified people to fill you in on that but that will require more than one lunch hour. We can start today.

Dropping one arm across her shoulder and the other on Ryan's they turned to go to the cafeteria and ran right into a surprised Summer.

**Seth**: Summer! We were just going to find sustenance, would you care to join us?

Summer didn't speak. Her tiny foot was tapping and her eyes shot daggers at Emily. Seth dropped his arms and looked bewildered at Summer. Summer took a step toward Emily and looked up into her eyes.

**Summer**: Aren't you the whore on the motorcycle?

Just for a second a deadly shadow came into Emily's eyes but it was gone as soon as it came.

**Seth**: Summer! What the hell is wrong with you?

**Emily**: Yes, I ride a motorcycle, a green one.

Summer glared at Seth and then turned back to Emily.

**Summer**: you have your hands all over private property there and if you know what good for you, you'll stay away from them.

**Ryan**: Summer back off.

Again Seth made opened his mouth to speak but Emily raised her hand to stop him.

**Emily**: It was not my intent to "handle your private stash". Please accept my apology. See you around guys.

Emily shouldered her way clear and walked down the hall. Summer turned to watch her. When she turned back to Seth and Ryan, the anger she saw in their eyes made her step back. Ryan stepped away and began following Emily.

**Ryan**: Seth, you really need to put her on a leash!

Grabbing Summer's arm and leaning into her face Seth's eyes said more than his mouth ever could.

**Seth**: Summer, we need to talk ... now!


	5. Chapter 5

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

Julie had been on the phone for over two hours and now she thought she was ready. She had removed the vodka bottle from Marissa's room and it was now in a tote bag by her purse. She climbed the stairs and entered her daughter's room.

**Julie**: Marissa honey, are you awake?

**Marissa**: Yeah I'm awake

**Julie**: sweetie, I made a doctor's appointment for you. I feel it is important we make sure this is nothing serious.

**Marissa**: I'm ok, mom. It's just a bug is something. I don't need to see a doctor.

**Julie**: Now honey I know what is best for you. Now let's get you up and dressed. Hurry so we won't be late. We were very lucky to get this appointment.

Marissa slowly got out of bed. She felt bad, the worse hangover she had ever had. She hoped the doctor would not be able to tell the real reason she was ill.

Julie kept a running conversation as she drove. Marissa stared morosely out the window.

**Marrisa**: Mom, where are we going. This isn't the way to Dr. Snow.

**Julie**: Dr Snow was full today, honey. Some of the girls recommended this new clinic. It is very exclusive and we were lucky enough to get you in.

**Marissa**: Oh

They turned into a secluded driveway and parked in an almost empty parking lot. The building was much bigger than Dr. Snow's clinic. There were no signs. The grounds were immaculate. The entrance opened into a large common room filled with over stuffed sofas, chairs and a juice bar.

Julie smiled and patted her daughter's arm.

**Julie**: Marissa go sit down and I'll let them know we are here.

Marissa found a chair and sat down. She continued looking around. This was not like any doctor's office she had been in before. Damn, she wanted a drink. She knew she shouldn't but she was so nervous. She idly picked up a magazine and leafed through it.

She looked up when she heard approaching footsteps. An attractive woman carrying a clipboard smiled at her.

**Nurse**: Mrs. Nichol, Miss Cooper would you come this way please?

As they gathered their purses Marissa noticed her mother was carrying a tote bag. Before she could ask about it they were whisked down an adjoining hall. The hallway was short and the room they entered was not far from the waiting room. They enter the exam room. "Now it was beginning to look like a doctor's office. "

**Nurse**: Please make yourself comfortable. They will be in to draw some blood shortly, then the doctor will see you.

Marissa climbed onto the exam table to wait. She looked around nervously. Julie came near and stroked her arm.

**Julie**: relax sweetie.

Marissa smiled weakly.

In no time at all the lab specimens had been collected and the doctor was entering the door. He was a big man. His voice was surprisingly soft and comforting.

**Doctor**: Hello. I am Dr. Meuler. We spoke on the phone.

**Julie**: Hello . I'm Julie Nichol and this is my daughter, Marissa.

The doctor looked at Marissa. He walked over and took her hand in his. They were huge hands, strong and firm. They made Marissa feel safe for some reason.

**Dr Meuler**: Now young lady, your mother tells me you have a problem.

**Marissa**: not really a problem I just seem to have caught a bug or something and am not feeling too well.

The doctor looked from Marissa to her mother. Julie opened her mouth to speak but the doctor motioned for her to be silent.

**Dr Meuler**: A bug, huh? Are you sure that is what the problem is?

Marissa looked down at his hands holding hers. She couldn't meet his eyes.

**Marissa**: of course, what else could it be?

Dr Meuler signaled for Julie to hand him the tote bag and he withdrew the empty vodka bottle. He held it out to Marissa.

**Dr. Meuler**: Do you know anything about this Marissa?

Marissa stared speechless. Tears began gliding down her cheeks.

**Dr. Meuler**: Marissa what can you tell me about this bottle?

Marissa looked from her mother to the doctor.

**Marissa**: I drank it but... it was just this once.. honest

**Julie**: Marissa... sweetie.. we just want what's best for you. We have a problem and we have to deal with it.

Marissa snorted.

**Marissa**: yeah right, out of my entire dysfunctional family I am the only one with problems..

Dr. Meuler could see the tension between mother and daughter and knew he had to defuse the situation.

**Dr. Meuler**: Marissa, no one here wants to hurt you. We want to help you.

**Marissa**: I want my father.

**Julie**: Your father has done quite enough already to add to the tension we are all trying to deal with. Dr. Meuler, you mentioned a treatment option called a 96 hour hold. I think we should begin there. I can't possibly deal with trying to get her dried out and sober at home. She would be safe and undisturbed here, with no one to bother her.

Marissa, turned to her mother trying to understand.

**Marissa**: What is a 96 hour hold? What are you trying to do to me? I want my father!

**Dr. Meuler**: Marissa calm down..

**Marissa**: "No!" you can't make me. I want my father! I want Ryan!

By now Marissa was yelling and near hysterics. Dr. Meuler let go of her hands and signaled for the hospital attendants.

**Dr. Meuler**: Marissa, let us help you.

**Julie**: Marissa, sweetie please.

The attendants came in and before Marissa realized it, they had injected her with a sedative.

**Marissa**: Please, Dr. Meuler call my father, please.. please. I don't need this. I'll cooperate but don't lock me up like this.. please.

Her words began to slur and soon she fell into the waiting arms of a male attendant. She was lifted onto a stretcher and taken to her room.

Julie stood by with tears streaming down her face. She turned and clung to the doctor for support.

**Dr. Meuler**: Mrs. Nichol, I do think it would be wise to notify your ex-husband and let him know the situation. I will want both of you hear for counseling sessions as soon as Marissa has completed detox.

Your daughter will need all the help she can get.

**Julie**: I'll do my best, Dr Meuler. May I comeback and see Marissa later?

**Dr. Meuler**: I think it would be best to wait until tomorrow. Call me in the morning.. Now you go home and get some rest. We'll take good care of her.

Julie wiped her eyes, collected Marissa's things and headed for her car..

Ryan struggled to get through the crowded hallway and catch Emily. He heard his cell phone ring. The caller ID showed it was Sandy.

**Ryan**: Sandy?

**Sandy**: Yeah Ryan, it's me. Look I'm on my way to the school now. Meet me out front. We are going to see Jimmy. I already talked with Dr Kim and told her I was picking you up.

**Ryan**: Ok see you in a few.

Ryan headed to his locker, all thoughts of Emily completely gone.


	6. Chapter 6

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

As Ryan talked, Jimmy struggled to understand. "What had he and Julie done to their daughter?"  
he thought. His poor baby girl. He gritted his teeth and waited for Ryan to finish.  
When Ryan was silent, Jimmy stood and headed for the door.

**Jimmy**: I need to see Marissa.

**Sandy**: Now Jimmy, don't fly off the handle. Marissa is living with Julie and Caleb so we are going to have to work with them.

Jimmy knew Sandy was right. He mentally kicked himself for allowing Marissa to stop her therapy sessions. She had been through so much. He had been wrapped up in his own troubles and hadn't noticed her slipping away. He reached for the phone and dialed Julie's number.

Julie entered the house and headed straight to the bar. God but she needed a drink. Her hands shook as she poured vodka over the ice. Raising the glass she downed the drink in one swallow and immediately filled the glass again. Within seconds the alcohol began relaxing the tension and she suddenly sat down as the tears rolled down her face. This was all Jimmy's fault... all his fault

The phone rang and she finished off her drink before she answered.

**Julie**: yes

**Jimmy**: Julie, I need to see you.

**Julie**: Jimmy, what do you want?

**Jimmy**: It's about Marissa.

**Julie**: Jimmy, I am very busy and don't have time for this.

**Jimmy**: You don't have time for your daughter? Julie our daughter is in trouble and needs us so you will damned well make time for me. I'm coming over and you had better be there.

Hanging up he turned to Sandy.

**Jimmy**: Sandy, I have a feeling I may need my lawyer with me.

**Sandy**: With you all the way, Jimmy

Sandy turned to Ryan.

**Sandy**: kiddo, I think you better sit this one out. No use in baiting the she bear by waving you in front of her. Take my car and I'll ride with Jimmy.

Ryan looked at the offered keys and then searched Sandy's face. He badly wanted to go with them but he could tell there was no way. Sandy was probably right anyway. He took the keys and they all went their separate ways.

Seth led Summer out onto the school grounds. Still holding her arm he pulled her closer.

**Seth**: Summer, what the hell is wrong with you?  
**Summer**: Seth, she's a sleezy tramp. I've seen her type before.

**Seth**: Summer, she is a new student who knows absolutely no one and it so happens she is nice, intelligent, and fun to be around.  
**Summer**: You forgot to mention cute and what a "hot chassis" she has. Seth, she had her hands all over you and Ryan. Since Marissa isn't here I felt it my duty to protect her interest.

**Seth**: Correction, I had my hands on her and Ryan. You totally embarrassed me with your obnoxious out burst. "whore on the motorcycle". That was completely out of line and as far as I am concerned until you apologize to Emily, we have nothing to say to each other.

He turned and stomped back to the school. Summer stood looking after him without believing what had just happened.

Emily sat on her bike rubbing the stiff muscles in her neck. Today had really sucked and each day that passed she disliked this place more. From now on she was going to steer clear of all of them. She put on her helmet and started her bike.

Ryan decided he would pick up Seth on the way home. As he drove by the school trying to spot Seth in the wave of exiting students, he saw a green Ninja pull out of the parking lot. "Seth, old buddy, catch ya later" he thought. "Gotta catch me a Ninja".

As Emily pulled onto the coast highway she leaned into the bike and opened the throttle. Her heart thrilled to the speed. She left her cares and focused only on the ride.

Ryan speeded up to try and keep the bike in sight. He was still on probation so he shouldn't take the chance of getting stopped but he had no intention of letting that bike get away.

Emily parked her bike by the garage. Pulling her helmet off and grabbing her pack she headed to the house. She heard a car and turned as the driver got out and headed toward her.

**Ryan**: Do you always drive that fast?

Emily smiled.

**Emily**: That wasn't fast, that was granny speed. What brings you to this neighborhood?

**Ryan**: I wanted to apologize for what happened today.

**Emily**: Not a problem. It's not unusual for girls to have a negative response to their boyfriends having female friends.

**Ryan**: It shouldn't have happened. I don't let anyone dictate to me who I can have as a friend.

He was silent then waiting for her to decide where this was going to go.

**Emily**: So.. umm.. you wanna come in and have something to drink?

Ryan smiled.

**Ryan**: I'd like that a lot.

Inside Emily put her helmet and pack in the closet.

**Emily**: I can offer you juice, soda or water.

Ryan: a soda would be good

Emily went to the bar and rummaged in the refrigerator. Ryan spied a group of pictures and went over to take a closer look. Emily was in many of them with people he assumed was her family. One picture with Emily and a boy caught his eye. A laugh escaped his lips.  
Emily came up behind him.

**Emily**: Find something funny?

Ryan pointed to the picture

**Ryan**: "Girls Kickboxing Champion" "Summer needs to see that one", he said with a chuckle.

Emily looked at the picture and a soft smile spread across her face.

**Emily**: My brother and I both won that day. Shall we go outside by the pool?

Emily led the way. Soon they were sitting side by side, sipping their drinks and kicking their feet in the water. A comfortable quiet hung around them. Finally Emily broke the silence.

Emily: So where was , Marissa right, today?

Ryan didn't speak immediately. He looked at Emily for a long while and then he began to speak. When he was finally done he had told her all of it. All about his move here, the fear, the frustration, Marissa, Theresa, all of it.

She had listened with out comment or interruption. When he had finished it was her turn to study him.

**Emily**: Wow and here I thought you were the strong silent type.

Ryan blushed then they both burst out laughing.

**Emily**: Thank you. I'm glad you shared that with me. I hope things straighten out for you and Marissa.

Voices filtered out from the house. Ryan looked at Emily.

**Emily**: My aunt and uncle.

**Ryan**: I probably should go. See you tomorrow?

**Emily**: yep you will.

She escorted Ryan to the door and waved good bye.


	7. Chapter 7

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

Ryan found Sandy and Kirsten in the kitchen. Seth was no where to be found.

He looked at Sandy.

**Ryan**: Well, what's going on?

Sandy explained, for the second time since he got home, the situation with Marissa.

**Ryan**: When can I see her?

**Sandy**: You can't.

Ryan opened his mouth to protest but Sandy raised his hand to silence him.

**Sandy**: Ryan, right now there is nothing you can do. In time she will need your support but she has to do this. You cannot do it for her.

Ryan knew Sandy was right but that didn't make it any easier.

**Ryan**: Ok, if I can't see her, what can I do?

Sandy showed a tired smile and put his arm around Ryan.

**Sandy**: Be patient.

**Ryan**: That wasn't what I wanted to hear.

Just then Seth entered the kitchen.

**Seth**: Ryan.. Dad.. so what's the deal with Marissa?

Sandy exchanged a look with Ryan.

**Sandy**: Ok Ryan, third times the charm it's yours this time.. Honey, what's to eat?

In the pool house both boys filled each other in on the happenings of their day. Seth wanted to know all about Emily. Ryan shared the highlights. He didn't really understand why but he just didn't want to talk about all of it.

**Ryan**: so ummm are you really fighting with Summer?

**Seth**: She was a total ass.

Seth paused for a long moment. Looking out the door and speaking almost to himself, he continued.

**Seth**: I'm different, Ryan. I don't know how to explain it... Sometimes I look at her and see how she can be and I ask myself what the hell am I doing with her and why did I ever want to be with her. Does that make any sense?

He looked questioningly at his friend.

**Ryan**: It makes a lot of sense. It has been a busy summer and we have all changed. Maybe in ways we didn't intend to or that aren't really for the better.

Feeling Seth's confusion and sadness, he squeezed Seth's shoulder.

**Ryan**: Hey man, we always have each other.

Seth looked into Ryan's face. Ryan made kissing sounds and fluttered his eyes at Seth.

Reaching behind him Seth grabbed a pillow from Ryan's bed a smacked his friend in the face. Ryan snatched a pillow and the fight was on. Sounds of laughter echoed across the pool and the time for serious talk ended in rowdy fun. The boys were home and happy to be there.

Marissa opened her eyes. She was lying on a mattress that was on the floor. The room was empty. The only light was on a tall ceiling. Slowly it came back to her. She quickly stood up and went to the door. There was no handle. She pounded on the door.

**Marissa**: Hello? Hello? Let me out... I want my father... anyone out there.

An observation window opened and an attractive woman looked in.

**Attendant**: Hello Marissa. My name is Charlotte but everyone calls me Charlie. How are you feeling?

**Marissa**: I want my father. Has he been called?

**Charlotte**: Now.. now first things first. How do you feel?

**Marissa**: I feel all right considering I am in here.

**Charlotte**: Are you hungry? You slept through the night and didn't have any supper.

**Marissa**: Can I get out of this room?

**Charlotte**: If I let you out, will be behave?

**Marissa**: I'll do whatever you say, just get me out of here.

Charlotte: ok.. here is the deal. I let you out, you eat some breakfast and behave yourself. If you don't... back you go and it will be a long time before I let you out again. Understand?

Marissa: I understand.

**Charlotte**: ok step back from the door now.

Marissa was in a new room with a window but it was covered in heavy fine wire.

Charlotte gave Marissa a conspiratorial wink.

**Charlotte**: I wasn't sure what you liked so I told them to bring everything. Told them you needed to be fattened up anyway. Now, how about a nice hot shower? That will make you feel like a new woman. By the time you get done your food will be here.

Her smile was infectious and Marissa soon found herself responding to Charlotte's gentle ways. Tears threatened her eyes but she fought to keep them at bay.

Showered and fed, Marissa did indeed feel better. Charlotte had brought her meds and explained what each one was. A knock sounded at the door and seconds later Dr. Meuler entered.

**Dr. Meuler**: Good morning, Marissa. Did you sleep well?

Marissa glared at the doctor.

**Marissa**: Why wouldn't I? You drugged me.

**Dr. Meuler**: you really didn't give me much choice now did you?

**Marissa**: From where I was, it seemed I was the one that had no choice. My mother snaps her fingers and you lock me up.

**Dr Meuler**: is that what you think happened?

**Marissa**: That is what I know happened. I want my father... **now**.

Her anger was showing more with each word she spoke. She thought it probably wasn't a wise thing to do but she could not help herself.

Dr. Meuler sat studying her. He drew a deep breath and let it out.

**Dr. Meuler**: Marissa, you have a problem with alcohol. It remains to be seen if you also have problems with any other controlled substances. You are suffering from severe depression, possibly bipolar. You have a rather colorful history of conduct. We have a lot of work to do... with your help it will be easier. I have you for 96 hours to evaluate your condition. I want to help you but first you have to decide two things.

First you have to decide to accept my help and second you have to decide to help yourself. I'll leave you alone for a while to think over what I have just told you. We'll talk later this afternoon.

Marissa watched him leave, her fear growing. She was locked up in a nut house. They could keep her as long as her mother wanted them to. The tears that earlier threatened became reality and she laid on her bed and cried herself to sleep.

Julie answered her phone.

**Jimmy**: It's me. We have an appointment at 1:00. Bring Marissa clothes and whatever else you think she might need.

**Julie**: Did they say how she is doing?

**Jimmy**: They said she was in with the doctor, whatever that means. See you at one.

He hung up the phone and fought against the tears that threatened to engulf him.

Emily turned down the hall to her locker and groaned inwardly. Beside her locker stood Summer. Steeling herself she move forward.

**Emily**: Excuse me, I need to get into my locker.

**Summer**: Yea, sure

Summer moved aside but continued to stand there.

**Emily**: Is there something you need?

**Summer**: Well, yea there is. Look I was pretty much a bitch yesterday.

**Emily**: I would say that is a pretty accurate assessment.

She was silent waiting for Summer to continue.

**Summer**: Well, I'm kinda sorry. My temper sometimes gets the best of me.

She looked expectantly at Emily but Emily remained silent. Summer stood twisting her hands and fingers and shuffling her feet.

Summer: So... um.. do you like accept my apology?

Emily's eyes hardened and she allowed her anger to show. Her previous attitude toward Summer's attack had been replaced by a slow burn. The more she had thought about it the madder she got.

**Emily**: I'll get back to you and let you know. Now if you'll excuse me.

She walked away leaving Summer unsure of what had happened.

Emily was still musing over the event when the warning bell sounded. Running down the hall she barely made it to class on time.

The day flew by amidst assignments and projects. When the last bell rang Emily happily headed to her locker. She dumped her books. No homework! She had gotten it done in class. Taking her backpack she headed to her bike.

On her way she saw Seth and Summer in earnest conversation "They really are a cute couple", she thought idly.

A young man with dirty blonde hair stood by her bike watching her approach. He smiled as she drew near.

**Ryan**: Hey, where you been hiding all day?

**Emily**: "Just trying to keep my nose clean and be respectable", she laughed What's up?

**Ryan**: umm. I was hoping we could maybe hang out for a while. Seth and Summer are in negotiations and it might get pretty messy at the house. I hate the sight of blood.

She loved the way he could convey so many emotions with nothing but a look. Right now his eyes twinkled with humor, a big contrast to the ice blue she had seen when he was angry.

**Emily**: So in other words you need rescued? I had planned on doing some riding tonight, wanna go with?

Think you could take riding behind a girl?

She couldn't resist a little teasing.

Ryan laughed. He raised his eye brows up and down in mock lechery.

**Ryan**: Just try me...

**Emily**: Give me your address. I'll go get my extra helmet and pick you up.

**Ryan**: I'll be ready.

They rode for miles, played in the surf, then shared burritos and nachos while they watched the sunset. Neither of them could remember any meaningful conversation. They just enjoyed.

Emily pulled the bike in the driveway.

**Ryan**: Wanna come in? I'd like for you to meet Sandy and Kirsten. Maybe we could find a movie to watch.

Splashing sounds came from the pool and Summer's voice yelled at Seth.

**Emily**: That, I think would be a very bad idea.

Ryan snickered.

**Ryan**: you could take her.. give her a kick or two in the head... might knock some sense into her

**Emily**: Atwood, you are bad! I'll see you tomorrow.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Striding from one side of the room to the other, Julie alternated between screaming and sobbing .

**Julie**: What am I missing here? I should be with my daughter. She needs me but what is happening? Instead of me she wants to see her felonious father and that juvenile delinquent brat. Why won't she see me? I'm not the perfect mother but I love her and know what is best for her. Are you listening Caleb?

Caleb loved his wife and she could make hell too hot for the devil if she was upset enough, so her happiness was one of Caleb's top priorities. He breathed deeply over the brandy snifter, swirling the golden liquid and watching the reflected lights. He looked up sharply when he heard his name mentioned.

**Caleb**: I'm sorry darling, I was mulling over some office troubles. What were you saying?

**Julie**: Caleb, I thought we agreed you would leave the office at the office. When you come home I want you all to myself and right now I desperately need your support and help to get my daughter back.

As she spoke, she glided across the room to him. Her arms reached around his neck and she looked into his eyes. She was the only woman he had ever seen that was beautiful even when she cried. It made it all the more difficult to deny her. Caleb embraced her and sighed.

**Caleb**: What can I do?

**Julie**: Find a way to get that brat away from my daughter. How can I get her into her new home and new life with him poisoning her against me? He's not good enough for her. Jimmy I'll just have to deal with.

Caleb: I'll see what I can do but he's just a kid...

Julie: Just a kid! That kid, as you call him, has undermined everything I have tried to do concerning my daughter since the day they met. Marissa is infatuated with his "bad boy "image and won't listen to me. He may have the others fooled but I see through him like glass. The situation is serious now. He has to be dealt with.

Caleb: Ok I'll look into it.

Who should he use? Leafing through his card file he picked out a name. Reaching for the phone he dialed the number and listened as it rang.

Hello..

Caleb: Hank, this is Cal Nichol.

Hank: Cal.. long time.. what can I do for you?

Caleb: I was wondering if we could meet for lunch. I could use your services on a small project.

Hank: Yea, lunch would work for me. Just came off an assignment and I'm free as a bird. When and where?

Caleb: How about the Lighthouse at , shall we say 12:30?

Hank: See you then.

Caleb had just ordered a drink when he saw Hank walk in. Caleb had used him many times in the past to acquire sensitive information.

Caleb: Hank, good to see you..

Hank: Caleb, it has been too long.

Caleb: I took the liberty of ordering you a drink.. I trust you still drink the same..

Hank: Somethings never change.... Now how can I be of service to you?

Caleb withdrew a picture from his pocket and laid it on the table between them.

Caleb: I have a small surveillance job for you. This young man is involved with my daughter and I need to know a little more about him than I presently do. Vital statistics are on the back. When can I expect a report?

Hank: Give me a couple of days.

Caleb: Excellent... now let's check these menus.


	8. Chapter 8

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

Marissa's lunch tray sat untouched. She stared, not really seeing, out of the screened window. The door opened and Charlotte came in. Frowning she looked at Marissa's uneaten lunch.

**Charlotte**: Ok, I admit the food here isn't award winning but it isn't that bad... can you think of anything I can temp your taste buds with?

Marissa made no response just continued to stare out the window.

**Charlotte**: Marissa, I asked if there was something you would prefer to eat?

**Marissa**: I'm not hungry.

**Charlotte**: Maybe later then, ok? Dr. Meuler wants to see you in his office.

Marissa slowly rose from her chair and allowed Charlotte to lead her down the hall.

Marrisa felt trapped. She was at the bottom of a deep black hole and wanted to stay there. She just wanted to be left alone. The alcohol she used to deal with these feelings was gone. She had no defense against the emptiness she felt.

As she entered the office, she saw Dr. Meuler sitting at his desk waiting for her. Smiling, he stood to greet her.

**Dr. Meuler**: Good afternoon Marissa

He waited a moment but when she gave no response he continued.

**Dr. Meuler**: Please sit-down and make yourself comfortable.

Marrisa slowly walked to a chair and sat. The anger she had shown earlier was gone.. in its place were the dead eyes of despair. It would be a few days until her medication enabled her to feel better. Her mood swings would be dramatic during that time.

**Dr. Meuler**: Your mother and father are coming this afternoon. Would you like to see them?

Marrisa raised her eyes to him.

**Marissa**: What for? They can't help me. Won't help me.. they put me here and left me

**Dr. Meuler**: That's being a bit melodramatic, isn't it?

No response.

**Dr. Meuler**: They are very worried about you.

No response

Dr. Meuler made some notes in Marissa's chart and rang for Charlotte to come escort her back to her room.

**Dr. Meuler**: Marissa, we'll talk again tomorrow.

Jimmy and Julie sat waiting for Dr Meuler to arrive. A hostile silence filled the room. At precisely one o'clock Dr. Meuler entered the room. Extending his hand he greeted them.

**Dr. Meuler**: Mrs. Nichol, Mr. Cooper, good to meet you. I bet you have a lot of questions so I'm just going to explain what my diagnosis is and give you a basic outline of Marissa's treatment plan. After I finish, I'll answer any questions you still have, ok?

Julie and Jimmy nodded in unison and Dr Meuler continued.

**Dr. Meuler**: There have been no physiological symptoms of alcohol withdrawal. She is severely depressed and I have started her on antidepressants. It's my opinion Marissa suffers from Bipolar Disorder. Is either one of you familiar with Bipolar Disorder?

Both Julie and Jimmy nodded their heads.

**Julie**: My mother is bipolar.

**Dr. Meuler**: Well then I would say you have a good understanding of the condition. That will be invaluable when it comes to helping your daughter. Along with medication to control her mood swings, Marissa will need to have psychological counseling. I would like you both to be included in parts of the therapy.

He paused to collect his thoughts.

**Dr. Meuler**: I'm going to be very direct here. Marissa is my patient and her outcomes are the priority for me. Marissa is struggling with a lot of emotional garbage, her bipolar condition just makes it harder to cope with, that's where the drugs and alcohol come in. I suspect most of this emotional garbage is oriented with the two of you. I am not here to judge either of your actions, my role is to help Marissa to cope with them in a way that will not be destructive to her. Honesty and candor, from all of you, is extremely important. Marissa must be able to trust me without reserve. I will not share what she confides to me with you or anyone else. Now, I'm sure you have some questions.

**Jimmy**: Can we see her?

**Dr. Meuler**: I want you to give her a day or two. She is having a difficult time right now. Why don't you plan on spending the day Saturday?

Jimmy sat looking into Meuler's face, the naked pain visible in his eyes. His mouth worked but no sounds came out. Meuler lightly touched Jimmy's arm.

**Dr. Meuler**: Mr. Cooper, we'll take good care of your daughter. Mrs. Nichols, do you have any questions?

Turning to Julie, Meuler could see the conflicting emotions play across her face. This woman wants her daughter well but she is hiding something.

**Julie**: No... Just make her well..

Jimmy and Ryan rode in silence each deep in their own thoughts. Finally Ryan was getting to see Marissa. Jimmy had been very open and honest and had kept him informed of what was going on but he needed to see her.

**Ryan**: Jimmy, I want you to know how much I appreciate you keeping me in the loop about Marissa.

Jimmy looked over at the boy that was so close to being a man. He really was a good kid and it was no secret how Marissa felt about him.

**Jimmy**: Marissa would want you "in the loop". You are very important to her.

As he parked the car and shut off the engine he continued.

**Jimmy**: Ryan, I need to warn you about how things might look to you today. Marissa is better and she wants to see you but she still isn't herself and frankly she won't be her old self for sometime. Just be patient with her and don't let your feelings get hurt.

**Ryan**: What do you mean, get my feelings hurt?

**Jimmy**: Marissa is very depressed and antidepressants take a while to start helping. Sometimes she just doesn't care.

They entered the building and started into the visiting area. Sitting alone waiting was Julie.

**Jimmy**: Julie, I didn't know you were going to be here.

**Julie**: Why wouldn't I be? She's my daughter.

Ryan stood back and said nothing. He found a chair close but not too close and sat down. He was nervous... where was she?

As if on cue a door opened and Marissa stepped into the room. Her eyes immediately found his and she ran across the room. She came into his arms and buried her face against his neck.

**Ryan**: Baby.. I missed you so much. Are you ok?

**Marissa**: I missed you ... I love you so...I'm ok, now

His lips found hers and they didn't care that her parents were looking on. Julie's eyes found the ceiling, the floor, the window.. anything except the spot where her daughter stood clinging to Ryan. When they separated, Marissa reached to hug Jimmy but never released Ryan's hand. They talked about everything and nothing and all too soon it was time to leave.

Ryan and Marissa stood looking into each other's eyes. He stroked her cheek, her hair. He wanted to comfort her but he wasn't sure how. He caressed her lips with his own wanting to let her know how desperate his love for her was. Neither wanted to let go and it wasn't until only their finger tips were touching that she turned and left through the door.

Ryan was silent on the drive home. Jimmy wished he could say something to make Ryan feel better but he felt too wretched himself to think of anything. He pulled into the Cohen's driveway. Ryan opened the door to get out of the car.

**Ryan**: Thank you..

His face was a work of misery.

**Jimmy**: No, it's me that needs to thank you for being there for my baby girl. I was really amazed at the change in her today. That change was because you were there. She hasn't been like that since she was admitted. I told them to let you see her whenever you wanted. I'll keep you posted.

Ryan closed the door softly and headed into the house.

Inside he heard Seth and Summer playing the PS2. He bypassed them and headed for the pool house.

He flopped on his bed he replayed the visit. He got up and paced the room. He needed to get out of here.

Reaching for the phone he dialed a number. It rang... and a welcome voice answered.

Tonight they sat on the same beach but munched Chinese food. Ryan watched her opening her fortune cookie and not for the first time wondered about her. She seldom talked about herself. She listened tirelessly anytime he felt the need to vent, which seemed to be all the time these days..... it felt like he had known her forever.

**Emily**: What?

**Ryan**: huh?

**Emily**: You're staring at me. If you think you are going to get my last Crab Rangoon, think again mister.. it's mine!

She emphasized her point with a playful poke in his chest.

Her smile faded and an expectant look covered her face.

**Emily**: So... come on.. spill it...

He met her gaze and began to tell her about his visit with Marissa.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Hank joined Caleb at his table. Opening a large envelope he began explaining the information he had collected.

Hank: He spends a lot of time with this girl. I ran a make on her. Name is Emily Tate. She just moved here and is living with her aunt and uncle. Parents are both dead. She goes to Harbor High .. nothing special. They seemed pretty chummy.

Caleb: Excellent. I couldn't have found a better opportunity. Here is what I need you to do.


	9. Chapter 9

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

It had been a week since Emily had seen or heard from Ryan. He visited Marissa every night and she had come home on a weekend pass today. Emily missed him. He was the closest thing to a friend she had in this alien place. She didn't understand these people or their values. She was glad things were better for Ryan and she realized more than likely her friend was now lost to her. She tried to ignore the hurt she felt over being suddenly and completely abandoned by Ryan, but it was just as well anyway. She had no business getting involved with any of these people. Time to get back to being her own person and doing her own thing.

It was Friday traffic was bad. She had an appointment for 6 and she did not intent to be late. Leaning forward, she boosted the throttle and soon left most of the traffic behind her. Within a few minutes she pulled into Oceanside. She was just a kid the last time she had been here. She found the dojo without problems and parked her bike. Slinging her bag over her arm she entered the small building.

Inside the door she stood and waited. In a few minutes a man made his way toward her. Mark Mathew was a tall powerfully built man. He moved with a fluid grace that belied his size.

Extending his hand he addressed her.

**Mark**: You must be Emily. Glad to meet you.

Emily smiled hugely and knew she already like this man!

**Emily**: Guilty, I am Emily.

**Mark**: Come on in the office so we can talk.

Inside the office he motioned her to a chair.

**Mark**: You are interested in lessons, right?

**Emily**: Yes, I want to continue my training and you come highly recommended. I brought my resume.

She handed him a folder and he leaned back, beginning to read. When he was finished he studied her for a moment.

**Mark**: Not too shabby, in fact pretty darned good. I see you studied in Okinawa.

**Emily**: Yeah, military brat. My father was stationed there for quite a while.

**Mark**: I make it a point to test all potential students. I take my teaching very serious and have no patience with someone that doesn't. Did you bring something to work out in?

Nodding she lifted her bag.

**Mark**: Good. The dressing room is to your left.

By the time they stopped, both of them were breathing hard and covered in sweat. Emily's body rejoiced at the return to activity it loved. Their movements were a choreographed dance of precision and power.

Mark was smiling.

**Mark**: "You are much better than your resume", he laughed. "I didn't think I would have to work that hard. Let's go back in the office"

Sitting behind his desk, he was silent for a moment.

**Mark**: Tell ya what... you are good! I'm going to make you an offer. I have a lot of beginning students. My helper is moving back home to Minnesota, if you can imagine that, so that leaves me in a bind. Good teachers don't grow on trees. This is my offer.... I'll give you lessons and you can have full use of the dojo and equipment and I'll pay you 150.00 a week, 175.00 if you want to teach a Saturday class. In return you teach some of my beginning students.

Emily could not believe her luck.

**Emily**: You have a deal!

**Mark**: Do you want to think about it? This will take up much of your free time from school. If you commit, I expect you to be here, no excuses. Surely you have a fella out there that might want to see you occasionally.

**Emily**: There is no one and I have nothing but time. When do I start?

Marissa looked around to make sure she had everything. A light knock sounded at her door and Dr. Meuler's head poked in.

**Meuler**: Well Marissa, are you excited about a visit home?

It was a minute before Marissa answered.

**Marissa**: Actually, I am really nervous...

Meuler chuckled.

**Meuler**: Marissa, I would be concerned if you weren't. You'll do fine, just take your medicine. If for any reason you should begin to feel overwhelmed just come back. It's that simple. Your father and I have already talked about this.

Closing and locking her suitcase, she looked at Meuler.

**Marissa**: I'm ready.

Jimmy and Ryan waited impatiently in the lobby. Julie had been livid when she found out she was not to be included in the weekend activities and that Marissa was staying with Jimmy. She railed at Caleb and Caleb hid at his office.

Finally Marissa came through the door. She hugged them both, then they were heading to the car.

**Jimmy**: Ok, what's it gonna be for dinner? Are we dining in or out? Cooking or ordering?

He looked at Marissa, who looked at Ryan who looked back at her.

**Ryan**: Your call, babe. Whatever you feel up to.

**Marissa**: How about we pick up Mexican and take it home. Maybe I will feel up to going out tomorrow.

**Jimmy**: You got it, sweetie.

Dinner done and dishes in the dishwasher, they all kicked back and relaxed. Jimmy watched the two of them together.

**Jimmy**: Hey, I think I'll just go for a drive, or a swim, or a hike and give you two some time alone. How does that sound to you?

Ryan didn't want to come out and say anything but he sure wished Jimmy would hurry. Marissa on the other hand had no trouble voicing a response.

**Marissa:** Bye

Jimmy laughed and crossed the room. Taking her in his arms he held her tight.

**Jimmy**: I am so glad you are here. Now I'm not .

Laughing he went out the door.

**Ryan**: Alone at last..... what shall we do? We got Monopoly, Risk, Life.. What'll it be?

He smiled as silky arms encircled his neck and Marissa snuggled close.

**Marissa**: I know a better game we can play. Are you interested?

Ryan's arms slid around her waist and he pulled her close.

A lecherous grin spread across his face.

**Ryan**: "My favorite game" he said as he snuggled her neck..

**Marissa**: Really, mine too. I'll go get it from my room.

Ryan stood back, a look of total confusion on his face.

**Marissa**: I'll go get the "Clue" game.

Ryan was still looking at her in disbelief.

**Ryan**: Clue? Are you serious?

Marissa had turned to go upstairs but she quickly turned back.

**Marissa**: Gotcha!

She flew into his arms and they both landed laughing on the couch..

Breathless, Ryan pulled back.

**Ryan**: Guess we're gonna be "clueless", huh?

Their laughter died as their lips met anew. Arms and legs askew, velvet skin against hard muscle, demanding lips and gentle hands.. a sense of coming home.

Marissa woke up early. She wanted to get Summer and Seth to come over. Maybe the four of them could do something today. She felt surprised at how good she felt. Before she could forget she took her pills. She stood at the window looking out and thinking about Ryan and last night. The phone brought her out of her reverie and she hurried to answer it just sure it was Ryan.

A voice she didn't know spoke her name...

**Voice**: Marissa?....poor crazy Marissa Ryan stays with you because he feels sorry for you. Why would he willing be with a crazy person?

**Marissa**: Who is this?  
  
**Voice**: ....he has another you know.... Sure you know..... I put pictures outside your door so you can see.....

**Marissa**: What do you want?

**Voice**: I'll call you later after you have seen.

The line went dead.

**Marissa**: Hello? Who are you? What do you want?

She hung up the phone. Pictures, they put pictures outside the door. She went to the front door and opened it.

Taped to the door was an envelope with her name written on it. He reached for the envelope but stopped, almost afraid to touch it. Biting her lip she forced her hand to take the envelope. Closing the door she went to her room.

She wouldn't open the envelope... she would just put it in a drawer and forget it.. that's what she would do.  
She went to put it down but her hand wouldn't let go.... She looked at it closely.... Her name scrawled across the front. She sat on the bed turning the envelope in her hands. Suddenly she made a decision and before she could change her mind she tore it open. Pictures fell to the floor. Bending to retrieve them she saw Ryan's face looking back at her. She picked them up one by one. Ryan was in all of them as was a single girl... a girl with long flowing red hair... Marissa could not see the green of her eyes but she knew who the girl was.

Tears flowed down her face as she struggled to understand.. Why? Why?

The phone rang again but she was afraid to answer it before she checked the Caller ID. This time it was Ryan.

Marissa: Hey

**Ryan**: Hi babe What's the plan for today?

**Marissa**: What do you think of getting Seth and Summer and all of us doing something?

Ryan couldn't put his finger on it but something was wrong.

**Ryan**: Marissa, are you ok?

**Marissa**: Sure, I'm fine. When you coming over?

**Ryan**: She didn't sound at all fine...I'm on my way.

He hung up the phone and headed out the door.

Marissa took one more look at the pictures then hid them in a drawer. She didn't know what she thought about

them.. it hadn't all soaked in yet.

She dialed Summer and didn't get an answer. Her eyes went back to the drawer with the pictures hidden in it.

When Emily had come in the previous night there had been a message from her Uncle Brad on the answer machine.

They were still in Greece and he left a number. They would call before they left for Russia.

Whoopie friggin doo! She grabbed a juice and went to the garage. She stopped by a bike identical to hers except for the Japanese figure "Ryuu" on one side of the tank and the name "Emmett" on the other. She touched the bike and felt the raised letters. She had paid for the lettering as a surprise for her brother, Emmett. If the bike had not been in the shop on the fateful day of the accident, her brother would have been riding it instead of being in the car with their parents. He would still be alive... She used to pout about them being alone. Frequent moves from base to base made making friends almost impossible. They had been shy and "joined at the hip" their mother had said. What one did the other did, where one went the other went. They were inseparable. Martial arts became their bridge to

people and they began to cultivate other relationships but never at any time did anyone come between them. She spit a sardonic laugh. She had thought they were alone! Well, now she knew "alone". She could frigging fall off the bloody planet and no one would know or give a rat's a$$.... Tears spilled from her eyes.

For Christ's sake, get a grip Emily.... She mentally slapped herself. Enough with the pity party...it could be worse... your aunt and uncle could be home and you know you can't stand them... she snickered. Deep breath... again... Get on your bike and go somewhere.

In minutes she was on the road and heading somewhere, she needed a destination.. food she hadn't eaten since lunch yesterday. Eating sounded like a plan.

For about the 20th time in the last week Ryan thought of giving Emily a call but like the other times he was tied up doing other things. He told himself he need to call her tonight when he got home. He missed hanging with her. He headed off to Marissa's.

**Ryan**: I can't imagine where Summer and Seth have gotten to. They weren't at the house when I left. Think of some stuff you want to do today.... Maybe while we're out we'll run into them. How about we go get something to eat?

Marissa: As long as it's not some place that is full of people I know. That would be too weird to deal with right now.

Emily spotted a place that looked like it would be ok. Not too crowded and it looked like it might have passed the last heath inspection. There was no hostess so she went on in to the dining room.

Ryan looked toward the door of the dining room and couldn't believe his eyes.

**Ryan**: Hey Emily, over here.

He stood so she could see him and motioned for her to come over.

Marissa turned and couldn't believe her eyes.

**Emily**: Hey Ryan.. Marissa, I don't know if you remember me but.

Marissa interrupted

**Marissa**: How could I forget you. How have you been?

Emily looked at Marissa. Something was strange about her behavior but then she didn't know Marissa.

Maybe that is just the way she is.

**Emily**: Good and you?

**Marissa**: Never better.... Why don't you join us?

**Emily**: I don't want to intrude.

**Marissa**: Oh but I insist.

Now even Ryan was looking at Marissa funny. There was something about the tone in her voice.

**Ryan**: You won't be intruding.

Emily sighed. Why the hell hadn't she stayed home and made a grill cheese sandwich?

She reluctantly sat down.

Emily didn't know what to say. She didn't know how Marissa would feel about Ryan telling her all about Marissa's trouble so she didn't extend her hope that Marissa was better real soon. That would be a dead giveaway! She really sucked at small talk.

The waitress saved the day by showing up to take her order.

**Marissa**: So Emily, how do you like going to Harbor School?

**Emily**: It sucks. How do you like going to Harbor School?

Marissa let out a giggle.

**Marissa**: It sucks. See we have something else in common besides Ryan.

The smile on Marissa's face was real enough but there were barbs hidden in those words.

Somehow they made it through the meal and were in the parking lot preparing to go their separate ways.

**Marissa**: Emily, you need to come over for dinner sometime.. how about next weekend?

**Emily**: Gee, that sounds really great but I'm not sure I can. I start a new job Monday and don't have my schedule.

I'll get back with you, ok?

Emily hoped she didn't sound as fake as she felt.

**Marissa**: Sounds great... just give Ryan a call...

There it was again...but this time she caught it and could define it. Jealousy... Marissa is jealous of Ryan and I being friends. Not to worry little princess... Ryan and I have already ditched our friendship so you have no worries! Like Ryan would look at anyone else with a girlfriend as beautiful as you are. Get over it!

On the outside she said:

**Emily**: Will do. See you both soon.

Now make like a shepherd and get the fl ock outa here, Em


	10. Chapter 10

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

Chapter 10

Ryan and Marissa stood next to the car trying to decide what to do next.

**Ryan**: Gotta use the facilities... be right back

Alone for a moment, Marrisa dialed Summer again and this time she answered.

**Summer**: Coop! How are you? Where are you? I have been frantic.

It was good to hear her friend's voice.

**Marissa**: I'm ok, Summer. Can you get away and come over to my Dads?

**Summer**: It will be a bit before I can get away from Mom-Zilla but I'll get there as soon as I can.

As Ryan was approaching she was closing her phone. He looked at her questioningly?

**Marissa**: That was Summer. She's all hurt because I haven't seen her or spent any time with her. Would you mind if she and I hung out alone this afternoon?

**Ryan**: No, that would be fine. I have some things I need to take care of too, so that will work out great.

He drove her back to Jimmy's.

**Ryan**: Call me when you want me to come back over.

**Marissa**: What are you going to be doing?

**Ryan**: Nothing much... there are a couple of things I have neglected this last week. I need to straighten that out, otherwise I'm just going to hang out.

She studied his face for a moment then lightly kissed his lips.

**Marissa**: I'll call you.

Then she disappeared inside the door.

Emily's phone rang. It was Ryan. She continued with her shopping ignoring the phone. She didn't want to talk to him.

It had been a long time since she had gone shopping. She picked several items and disappeared into a fitting room. Her phone rang again and again it was Ryan. She turned it off.

She was walking down the street when she spied a curly mass of hair almost as distinctive as her own.

As if by telepathy Seth turned toward her, he looked surprised and very pleased.

**Seth**: Emily, wasup?

**Emily**: Just doing a little shopping.. what about you?

**Seth**: hiding...

**Emily**: hiding? From who or what?

**Seth**: from whatever or whoever is looking for me.

**Emily**: Oops, sorry I'll leave you alone

**Seth**: No.. no wait.. you would not be in the group you are referring to. In fact being found by you is the best thing that has happened to me all day.

She laughed and looked around.

Emily: Where's Summer?

Whispering conspiratorially Seth leaned toward her.

**Seth**: Now she would be in the group I was referring to. You haven't seen her have you?

**Emily**: Nope, I ran into Ryan and Marissa but no one else.

**Seth**: Could I possibly interest you in a tantalizing libation from the finest juice bar around?

Emily looked at Seth. Something about him made her want to protect him, like she would a child. There was such innocence about him.

**Emily**: Juice sounds great.... My treat

They found a table and sat down to enjoy their refreshments.

**Emily**: If you are mad at Summer because of what she said to me, don't be. It 's over with and it really wasn't a big deal.

Seth looked off into space for a time before he answered.

**Seth**: I don't know how I feel about Summer, it changes moment to moment, it's like one of those lights... clap on, clap off... today I'm off.

They talked about school and Seth filled her in on past scandals, who the good teachers were, juicy gossip.

Emily told him about her new job and invited him to come see her.

When it was time to leave Emily felt much better. She truly enjoyed Seth's company.

**Seth**: Hey, let's not be strangers, ok?

**Emily**: Definitely not.

They were saying good-bye when Ryan walked up.

**Ryan**: Hey guys

He looked at Emily.

**Ryan**: I have been trying to call you.

Emily pulled out her phone to check it.

**Emily**: oops, I have it turned off.

**Ryan**: I was calling to apologize...

**Seth: **Emily. Gotta blaze. Ryan.. see you at home

**Emily**: By Seth.. Later

**Ryan**: I'm sorry I haven't called or anything all week

**Emily**: Ryan, it doesn't matter. You have been worried about Marissa. How is she?

Ryan: Doing better. I really am sorry..

She raised her hand to silence him.

**Emily**: Forget it. It's probably for the best anyway. I have to go too. Maybe I'll see you around sometime.

She left Ryan standing there, wondering after her.

He called to her but she didn't turn.

Marissa opened the door and Summer lunged in hugging her close.

**Summer**: Coop, I have missed you. How have you been.. why didn't you call me?

Marissa smiled. Same old Summer, she realized how much she had missed her.

They made light conversation catching up on gossip and girl stuff. Finally Marissa got up and headed for her bedroom.

**Marissa**: I'll be right back.

**Summer**: "k"

In a moment Marissa as back and she dropped an envelope on the table in front of Summer.

**Summer**: What's this?

**Marissa**: Look at them

Summer removed the pictures from the envelope. One by one she checked them out... Ryan with Emily eating... Ryan with Emily on her motorcycle... Ryan with Emily at the beach wrapped in a blanket. They were all Ryan and Emily.

**Summer**: what the hell are these?

The phone rang. Summer waited for Marissa to answer it. It rang again and Marissa just looked at it.

**Summer**: Aren't you going to answer it?

Slowly Marissa picked up the receiver.

**Voice**: Well.. did you like the picture?

**Marissa**: Who are you? What do you want?

Summer looked at Marissa and saw the look on her face. Instantly she was at Marissa's side. Marissa pulled the phone away from her ear far enough for Summer to hear the conversation.

**Voice**: Don't you think your boy friend takes a good picture? By the way... look on your door... there are more.

A cold laugh came through the phone.

**Marissa**: Stop bothering me!

Marissa listened.. he had hung up.

Summer and Marissa looked at each other, the phone, the pictures and neither one spoke. Finally Summer broke the silence.

**Summer**: Coop, what is this all about?

Marissa went to the door. She hesitated for a moment, then pulled it open. Another envelope hung on the door. With trembling hands she pulled the envelope free and closed the door.

Tearing the envelope open, she found more pictures of Ryan with Emily. She recognized the shirt. He was wearing it this morning. He left her and went straight to find Emily! She couldn't believe it.

Slowly Marissa began to tell her friend what had been happening.

Summer was silent waiting for Marissa to finish. When Marissa fell silent, Summer spoke up.

**Summer**: So.. what are we going to do?

**Marissa**: I don't know..

**Summer**: Come on Coop.. think, we need a plan

Marissa continued to act odd for the rest of the weekend but Ryan figured it was her medicine. They had told them she might behave strangely until her dosage was regulated.

He and Jimmy took her back and he was surprised to see the relief in her face as they entered the clinic. Jimmy scooped her into his arms and held her tight.

**Jimmy**: Night sweetie. I love you.

She turned to Ryan. He held her then thoroughly kissed her waiting lips.

**Ryan**: Love you

**Marissa**: me you too.

Then she was inside the doors and the two men were alone.

Kirsten dropped the boys off at school on her way to work.

**Seth**: Isn't it wonderful to be back. I think they should cancel weekends so we could come here everyday. My god Ryan, look at the guy. His knuckles are only about 3 inches off the floor and you could braid the hair on them. Not to mention the slope of that forehead! I bet he is a star football player... what do you think?

As if on cue, the Neanderthal shouldered his way by Seth nearly knocking him to the ground.

**Seth**: Where do these animals come from?

Ryan chuckled and continued scanning the parking lot for Emily.

Finally he spotted her bike. She must already be inside.

Emily stood in front of her locker. Secured to the door was a blood red rose with a note attached.

A voice came from behind her.

**Summer**: Wow, somebody likes you!

Emily turned.

**Emily**: it is beautiful. One perfect red rose.

She took the rose and the note off the door. She wanted to open the note and see whom it was from but Summer stood beside her. She was afraid Ryan had done this as a peace offering and that was the last thing she wanted Marissa's best friend to know. Opening her locker she got her books out and put the rose and note in. She closed the locker and made sure it was locked.

**Summer**: You're not going to see who it's from?.. or do you already know?

Emily turner to Summer, her frustration evident.

**Emily**: Summer, what do you want?

**Summer**: I'm just trying to be friendly. I apologized for the way I acted to you and I would like for us to start over. A lot of things happened last year and I don't really have that many friends here and with Marissa gone I'm kinda at loose ends.

Summer met Emily's eyes and Emily thought she saw sincerity in them.

**Emily**: Now it's my turn to apologize. I had a bad weekend and I'm feeling grumpy.

**Summer**: I can understand.. maybe you'd feel better if you found out who sent you the flower.

Emily smiled

**Emily**: I'll look later.. I'm out of time.

She made her way to her class. She didn't look behind her and see Summer perusing her locker.

**Summer**: Damn! I wonder if that is from Ryan?

Giving up for the moment, she headed to her own class.

At lunch Emily got the note from her locker. Looking around to see if Summer was near she opened it.

There was no signature, only part of a poem:

The Rainbow comes and goes,  
And lovely is the Rose,  
The Moon doth with delight  
Look round her when the heavens are bare,  
Waters on a starry night  
Are beautiful and fair;  
The sunshine is a glorious birth;  
But yet I know, where'er I go,  
That there hath past away a glory from the earth.

Emily was completely confused... Who had sent this and why?

After the last bell she hurried to her locker. She didn't want to be late for her first day on the job. She was not surprised to see Summer waiting for her.

Summer: Hey

Emily: Hey

Summer: So did you open it yet?

Emily laughed...

Emily: I think you were more curious that I was. I opened it at lunch. It isn't signed. Only a poem.

Summer: You don't know who sent it?

Emily: No idea

Summer: Could I read it?

Reaching into her locker Emily brought out the note. She handed it to Summer.

Summer: Awesome... you have a secret admirer.

Emily snorted and turned to face her.

Emily: What I think is, someone got the wrong locker. I hardly know 10 people here and none would send me a flower.

Summer: Someone thinks you're hot. This is so romantic!

Emily: Look Summer, I gotta go to work. See ya later.

Summer: Work? Where you working?

Emily didn't hear Summer's question. She was already moving down the hall.

Ryan hung up the phone. He had left a message telling Marissa he wouldn't be there tonight. Since they spent the weekend together he thought maybe she wouldn't miss his visit too much, and he had to see Emily and make things right. He needed to make her understand how important she was to him. He knew she was hurt.. His feelings were a jumbled mess but he couldn't let her slip away, of that he was certain. He tried Emily's number several times but there was no answer. He decided to borrow the Rover and go to see her.

Emily was exuberant. Tonight she had taught a group of children and she loved it. After the class, Mark worked with her for a while then they spared for almost an hour. She was happy as she headed toward home.

She parked her bike in the front and went in the front door. She didn't bother with the lights.. the security light outside was so bright it lit the room.

Tossing her backpack in a chair she padded down the hall to her room. She pulled her shirt off and was heading to the bathroom when she heard a scraping sound from the dark area she had just left. She stopped and stood still, straining to hear any further sounds. What had actually been 1 minute had seemed like an hour. She was about to scold herself for being a ninny, when she heard a faint rubbing sound like something moving against the wall ... That was all she needed. She moved like lightening entering the bathroom and exiting into the bedroom on the other side. She moved as quiet as she could and headed out the bedroom and toward the closest exit, which was the front door. By the time she hit the door, she was running. She heard sounds behind her and she fumbled frantically with the lock.. finally it opened and she fell through the door and into a pair of outstretched arms. The scream that had been stuck in her throat suddenly broke free and she reacted purely on instinct, blocking the hands and striking out, knocking her assailant to the ground.

Ryan found himself on the ground with the wind knocked out of him. As he lay there gasping he looked up at Emily. He struggled trying to speak but he couldn't even breathe yet.

When her eyes adjusted she realized it was Ryan on the ground in front of her.

**Emily**: You a$$hole! What the hell were you trying to do? You scared the bejesus out of me! What were you doing in there?

Finally Ryan was able to draw air into his lungs and he sat up.

**Ryan**: What the hell is going on? What are you talking about?

**Emily**: Are you all right? Why were you in my house trying to scare me?

**Ryan**: In your house? I just got here and was about to ring the doorbell when you come screaming out the door and creamed me. Was there someone in there with you?

Emily looked at Ryan, then back at the house.

**Emily**: It wasn't you in there?

**Ryan**: That is what I just said. How could I be in there and out here at the same time? What happened?

She leaned against him and standing on the porch, in the circle of his arms, she told him what had happened. They went back into the house turning on all the lights and opening all the doors. They found nothing gone or out of place.

**Ryan**: I think we should call the police.

**Emily**: me too

**Ryan**: you know what else I think?

**Emily**: What?

**Ryan**: I think you better put a shirt on before they get here.

Looking down Emily realized she was just wearing her bra and jeans.

Emily: Did you just notice this?

Ryan chuckled

Ryan: No

The police came and went, asked endless questions and found nothing. They suggested she stay with friends or have someone stay with her.. told her they would put an extra car out a few times tonight, then they were gone.

Suddenly she began to shake and she collapsed to the floor, her knees too weak to hold here. Ryan was by her side holding her and rocking her gently until the shaking stopped.

**Emily**: How embarrassing...

Ryan chuckled

**Ryan**: hell I was just thinking what a tough guy you are.. can I feel your muscle?

They laughed and Ryan helped her to her feet.

**Emily**: What are you doing here anyway?

Ryan smoothed the hair from her face and looked into her eyes.

**Ryan**: I had to see you.. to make you understand

**Emily**: Understand what?

**Ryan**: You are important to me. I know I hurt your feelings. I just didn't think.. I was so wrapped

**Emily**: Sh-h-h Enough I do understand. You have been frantic about Marissa. Let's talk about this later. Go home and get some sleep. We both have school tomorrow

**Ryan**: Do you think I'm going to leave you here alone?

**Emily**: I can set the security system.. I'll be fine..

**Ryan**: NOT!

In the end they went to the Cohen's house to pick up Ryan some clothes and drop off the rover.

Summer saw Emily and Ryan arrive for school together. They stood at the entrance talking with their heads together, then separated and went their own ways.

On Emily's locker a white rose with a note waited and a white envelope address to: "Marissa Cooper" at her father address was dropped in a mail box and began making its way to her.

excerpt from the poem Intimations of Immortality from Recollections of Early Childhood by William Wordsworth


	11. Chapter 11

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

Ryan found Seth and told him what had happened.

**Ryan**: I have to go see Marissa tonight. Could you stay with Emily till I get here?

**Seth**: Bro, you make it sound like a major sacrifice to hang out with a total hottie for the evening.. oh the pain!

**Ryan**: Thanks man .. be careful

**Seth**: Not to be a wet blanket but what exactly do you plan on doing?

**Ryan**: I'm not sure.. when I figure it out I'll let you know. Emily has just about convinced herself it was all just her imagination.

**Seth**: What do you think?

Ryan handed Seth the helmet, shrugged his shoulders and was gone.

&&&&&&&&

"White this time", she mused. Emily smelled the heady rose perfume. She held the note in her hand, turning the envelope over, inspecting each side. She tore it open and pulled out the note.

What though the radiance which was once so bright

Be now for ever taken from my sight,

Though nothing can bring back the hour

Of splendour in the grass,

of glory in the flower;

We will grieve not, rather find

Strength in what remains behind;

"More poetry and still no signature, who the hell was doing this," Emily fumed.

She heard a voice behind her.

**Summer**: "Did he sign it this time?"

Emily turned to see Summer approaching.

**Emily**: Nope, he is still incognito.

**Summer**: This is so romantic.

**Emily**: I don't think it is romantic.. it is giving me the creeps

&&&&&&&&&&

Em**ily**: Seth, I'll be fine.. really I have to work, there is no need for you to baby-sit me.

**Seth**: On the contrary, if Ryan comes to your house and finds you alone, I could come up permanently missing, so do me a favor and allow me to tag along.

**Emily**: Ok, if you insist but prepare to be bored out of your mind. Ever rode a bike before?

Seth: Nope and I can't wait... just be gentle...

Laughing they piled onto the bike.

&&&&&&

When Ryan entered the building Marissa was already in the common room using the phone. As he approach she ended the conversation and hung up the phone.

Smiling he reached for her. She was stiff in his arms and less than responsive to his kiss.

**Ryan**: How ya doing?

**Marissa**: Good... I missed you last night

**Ryan**: I'm sorry I had some stuff I had to do and since we spent the weekend together I didn't think you would really miss me. Did you mom come out?

He could tell Marissa was upset. Her fingers were madly drumming on the tabletop. Damn, that was annoying.

**Ryan**: How was your day?

**Marissa**: Long

Ryan made several attempts to engage Marissa in conversation. She grew more agitated by the minute. He reached for her hand but her finger lay unresponsive in his hands. Mercifully the visiting hours came to an end. Ryan kissed her and headed back to the Cohens. That had really sucked. He hoped there wouldn't be too many more like that one.

He hadn't been home very long when Seth and Emily arrived.

**Seth**: Dude, no wonder she kicked you're a$$. Have you ever seen her do her thing? Makes Bruce Lee look like a sissy.

Ryan glared at Seth and Emily couldn't help but laugh.

**Ryan**: She didn't kick my a$$.

**Seth**: Ryan, I'm sorry but you were lying on the ground and she put you there so therefore she kicked you're a$$. I think if we did a poll, we would get a consensus on that. Let's ask mom and dad.

Seth headed off to get Kirsten and Sandy. Alarmed Ryan called him back.

Grinning Seth came back his mouth working but no sound, "she kicked you're a$$", all the while pointing to Emily.

**Ryan**: We need to leave.

Emily was laughing as she watched the two boys. Glaring at Seth, Ryan headed outside.

Still giggling, Emily hugged Seth

**Emily**: God that was great. What I wouldn't give for a recording of it.

As she joined Ryan at the bike she started laughing again. Now it was her turn to get glared at.

**Ryan**: You ready?

**Emily**: Ryan. I'll be fine. You need to stay home. What are the chances of some freak trying to break into my house two nights in a row?... if someone did. The police found nothing, maybe I just heard some odd sounds and imagined the whole thing.

**Ryan**: Not a chance... he didn't **try** to get in, he got in.

**Emily**: Did you see anyone? What are you gonna do, camp on my doorstep until my aunt and uncle find their way home? There is a security system and I have pepper spray. Ryan, I'll be ok.

**Ryan**: And someone was till in your house waiting for you.

**Emily**: Were they? No one has found anything that points to someone being in the house. Maybe I imagined the whole thing. I'll call you when I get all locked in, ok?

**Ryan**: I don't like it.

**Emily**: I appreciate your concern, I really do. Thank you for being my friend. I'll call you when I'm all tucked in. Now please stay home.

**Ryan**: You have 30 minutes. If I haven't talked to you within 30 minutes after you leave here, I'm coming over.

Emily smiled and kissed him on the cheek.

**Emily**: Thank you... 30 minutes.

Emily checked the doors and windows as she talked to Ryan on the phone.

**Emily**: Security panel is all set... I have my pepper spray in my hand.. the grenade launcher is on the floor by my bed...will you relax! I'm gonna start calling you "Mom". Now go to bed and get some sleep cause that is exactly what I am gonna do. See you both tomorrow, good night.

Emily hung up the phone. Looking around she wished she truly felt the bravado she had just put on for Ryan.

Stop being such a nit wit.. take a hot shower then to bed you go, her inner voice chimed in.

She was asleep before her head hit the pillow.

Emily woke to the sound of the security alarm going off. Silently she rolled off the bed and crawled under it. Her pepper spray and cell phone were already there waiting for her. As she was dialing 911, she heard someone running past her window. This was not her imagination.....

The police arrived and once again found nothing. Emily got the idea they didn't think there was anything to find. They left again, saying they would send a few extra cars around.

Emily fixed a pot of coffee. No way was she going back to bed. Sitting at the table drinking coffee her eyes fell on a vase holding two roses.. a light went on in her head.... could the person trying to get into the house be the same one that was leaving the roses?

&&&&&&&&&&&&

Julie filled her glass again.

**Julie**: I won't let him get away with this... he has poisoned my daughter against me....she won't even see me, she just clings to that juvenile delinquent.

**Caleb**: Juju, it will be all right, you'll see.... These things have a way of working themselves out. She's just a kid.

**Julie**: I love my daughter.. I only want what is best for her.

**Caleb**: it will be ok, you'll see.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&


	12. Chapter 12

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

Marissa was angry. Stiffly she stalked around the waiting area, her mind fuming.

"While I'm trapped in this damned place, that bitch is going after Ryan and it appears Ryan is falling for it....roses and poems... he never sent me roses and I never really knew he was interested in poetry. I need to get out of here. I need to be with Ryan."

She knew this voice and deep inside she knew it didn't always tell her the right thing but these days her emotions seemed to be way ahead of her head.... High.. low... high...low. Dr. Meuler told her to be patient. She didn't have time to be patient... she needed to get home.

She heard her name called and looked to see Dr. Meuler waving for her to come in. Sighing she got up.. time for another session. She wondered if she should mention the phone calls and pictures.. then solidly rejected the notion. She wanted to go home and if Meuler thought something might upset her she would never get out of here. She put on her best happy face and pulled out all her negotiating skills and prepared to go to work.

**Meuler**: Marissa, how are you? Please sit.

**Marissa**: I'm much better... in fact I would like to talk about the possibility of me going home.

**Meuler**: I'm willing to talk about anything you like.

**Marissa**: Dr Meuler I am much better... I have a ways to go but I feel in order to continue making progress I need to be out in the world not hiding in here afraid something might upset me.

She continued talking animatedly, logically listing reasons why she felt she should be allowed to go home.

When she was finished, she looked questioningly at Meuler.

**Meuler**: Well, I see you have really been thinking about this.

Marissa eagerly nodded.

**Meuler**: Marissa, I heard you out .. now will you do me the same courtesy?

Again Marissa nodded.

**Meuler**: Marissa, we have been dealing with a condition you have had all your life. Since it was untreated, it forced you to invent coping mechanisms that enabled you to live in your world. Although these skills helped you, they are extremely destructive to normal healthy mental attitudes. I know you want a normal life and I want that for you. What we are doing with medication and the various therapies we have you in is building the necessary foundation for you to begin that normal life. Without a firm foundation you could easily be overwhelmed while trying to handle situations and could conceivably return to those destructive coping mechanisms. This is not going to be what you want to hear but I don't feel you have a sufficient foundation to release you. We will continue the weekend passes and if you maintain your rate of progress we can revisit this topic next week.

Deep inside Marissa knew everything he said was right but that didn't stop her anger.

She rose to leave.

**Meuler**: We still have 30 more minutes.

**Marissa**: I'm tired of talking and listening!

She turned and left the room.

**Seth**: Ok Ryan, you can tell me... what exactly is going on between you and Emily? You are making me dizzy watching you run back and forth between your "two women".

**Ryan**: We're friends.. just like you and her are.

**Seth**: Yea right.. anyone believing that, I have a bridge in New York City I'll sell real cheap! Come on Ryan.. give..

Ryan was silent for a moment. Then speaking slowly and choosing his words carefully he began talking. He wanted Seth to understand and talking about things like this was very difficult for him.

**Ryan**: After all that has happened I'm not sure what my feelings for Marissa are. I care for her and want to be there for her but hell, sometimes I feel like her father! Nothing has happened between Emily and I but I think maybe I would like it to.

Ryan paused, looking out the window. Seth sat very quiet. He knew how hard this was for his friend. Ryan didn't talk well at all.

**Ryan**: I'm human.. sometimes I get scared, weak, overwhelmed..... lost I can't be that way with Marissa. I need to be strong for her but I think that somehow it is important to me to be needed that much.

With Emily, I can tell her it hurts, that I'm afraid and since she damn near kicked my a$$ I sure don't have to protect her. I don't understand it. From day one there has been this chemistry between us. I'm beginning to understand how you felt jumping between Summer and Anna.

Seth knew it wasn't just Marissa that put Ryan in this position. It was Summer and him as well.. Since day one Ryan had been the strong one.. the leader.. who else would have gone toe to toe with Julie Nichol?.. only Ryan. He seemed to feel he had to justify his existence by taking care of others. Seth made a silent vow to do better by his friend from now on.

**Seth**: Well , I'm glad you are at least admitting she kicked you're a$$.

Both boys laughed and headed to the kitchen. It was time to leave for school.

Emily hung up the phone. Mark hadn't been too happy about her needing a few days off but he had given them to her. She felt bad but she needed time to put her plan into action.

When she arrived at her locker this morning, there had been no rose, note or Summer. "There must be a god", she thought. Since there was no rose this morning, maybe someone would be dropping by to leave one for tomorrow. If her plan worked, she would be here to receive it. A few feet from her locker was a janitor's supply room. It was unlocked during the day and she had already discovered a cabinet with plenty of room for her to hide until the cleaning crew left, then she could hide unseen in the recessed doorway in the hall and keep watch on her locker. No one would be able to approach her locker unseen.

It wasn't brilliant but it was all she had.

The last bell rang and Emily hurried toward her locker and the janitor closet. Damn, there was Ryan and Seth.

**Emily**: Hey, guys

**Ryan**: Hey.. Where's your bike? I didn't see it in the parking lot.

**Emily**: Oh, I parked over on the other lot this morning.. why?

**Seth**: Ryan is just playing "mother hen" today.

Ryan glared at Seth and then turned to reply to Emily.

**Ryan**: I was kinda worried when I didn't see it and hadn't run into you today. I assume your evening was uneventful, since I didn't hear from you last night

Emily looked at Ryan and grinned .She didn't want to lie to him but neither did she want to get into that discussion here and now.

**Emily**: All peace and quiet. You seeing Marissa tonight?

**Ryan:** Yep, you working tonight?

Inwardly she cringed as she told another little white lie.

**Emily**: Yep, going straight there from here.

**Seth**: Hey, you want me to go with? I could hold your jacket if you had to kick some butt.

Emily hadn't counted on Seth offering to accompany her and her brain scrambled for an excuse.

**Emily**: Gee Seth, if I had thought of it I would have brought my extra helmet. I am already running too short of time to go get it. Guess I need to keep one here, huh? But I really appreciate the offer.

**Ryan**: I could come by later......

He left the phrase hang waiting to see where Emily would take it.

**Emily**: Ryan, could I get a rain check? All of this excitement has me hardly sleeping and I am pooped. I think I'll crash as soon as I get home.

**Ryan**: Ok, see you tomorrow then., but call if you need me ,all right?

**Emily**: Sure thing.

**Seth**: Emily, Ryan isn't the only hen here so why don't you give me a call when you get home. That way we'll know you got there all right.

**Emily**: Seth....

**Seth**: I know, you're Billy Bad but humor me... please?

Emily suddenly felt tears forming. It had been a long time since she felt anyone gave a damn about her. Not for the first time she marveled at the friends she had made.

**Emily**: Thank you, Seth. I'm not bad, just don't want to be a bother. I'll call.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Ryan tried everything to get Marissa involved in his visit. No matter what he said she didn't answer at all or her reply was almost hostile. Finally he couldn't stand it any longer. He took both her hands and forced her to look at him.

**Ryan**: Talk to me! Tell me what the hell is going on with you.... please!

**Marissa**: Do you really want to know?

**Ryan**: What kind of question is that? Yes, for god's sake talk to me... I can't do this any more!

Marissa met his eyes with burning rage.

**Marissa**: How about we talk about roses, poems and pictures on the beach...

Ryan opened his mouth and started to speak then stopped. What had she said?

**Ryan**: What are you talking about? You're not making sense.

**Marissa**: I know all about you and Emily. Even though I am locked away in here I get reports about the roses and poetry you leave on her locker. And I have tons of pictures of you together. Are you going to deny it?

Marissa was yelling by then and nurses came running out of the office.

**Nurse**: Sir, you're going to have to leave.

**Ryan**: But..

**Nurse**: I said you have to leave now!

Marissa didn't resist them. They came from all sides, grabbed her and then she was beyond the door.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Emily waited till Ryan and Seth was out of sight then grabbing her pack she made for the janitor room.

She pulled a roll of duct tape from her pack and taped over the door latch so it wouldn't lock. Closing the door behind her, she opened the cabinet and crawled inside to wait. It was cramped but it was the best she could do.

It was quiet in the room after the cleaning crew got their supplies and went to work. So quiet her heavy eyes soon closed and she went to sleep.

The noise of the returning workers awakened her and she barely stopped herself from trying to sit up in the small cabinet. She lay still listening to the friendly banter as the workers readied themselves to go home. Laughing and talking they left the room closing the door behind them.

Emily checked her watch and made herself wait a full 30 minutes. She pulled a small flashlight from her pocket and opened the cabinet door. The room was pitch dark. She crawled out of the cabinet and tried to stand. Her feet and legs were numb and threatened to drop her back to the floor. Covering her light she limped to the door and opened it a crack. The hallway was dark. The only light came from the ghostly glow of the exit signs. She stepped out of the room. The doorway was recessed back from the hall far enough to provide her with a pretty good hiding spot. She closed the door and sat down in the floor to wait.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

Ryan sat in the Rover too stunned to do anything else. What the hell had all of that been? Roses and poetry, that was way out in left field. What kind of drugs were they giving her? Someone had to know something and he would question them one at a time till he found some answers, beginning with Summer.

Ryan stood awkwardly waiting for Summer to answer the door. He had never been to her house before.

**Summer**: Chino, what a surprise. What are you doing here?

**Ryan**: Got a few questions I need to ask you.

**Summer**: Questions? About what?

**Ryan**: roses and poetry...Marissa seems to think I have been giving roses and love poems to Emily. Any idea where she would get a notion like that?

**Summer**: ummm what a crazy idea...I didn't know you were into poetry... I know that someone has left a rose and a poem on Emily's locker a couple of days.

**Ryan**: you mean there really has been flowers and poems? Who left them?

**Summer**: Yes.. unknown no signature.. You have no idea who it is?

Something in the way Summer looked at him told Ryan everything he needed to know.

**Ryan**: You told her, didn't you? Why?

Summer glared at Ryan.

**Summer**: I did it because you are making a fool out of her. She's locked up in the loony bin and you're out here chasing tail! As her best friend I felt she needed to know.

Ryan had never wanted to slap a girl so badly in his life. Summer stood there, with her face just inches from his, daring him. His hands were curled into fists and he spoke to her through clenched teeth.

**Ryan**: You have no idea what you have done... if someone is sending flowers and poems, it isn't me and the only thing you have done is cause your best friend pain for no reason at all.

**Summer**: Not just flowers, roses.. huge romantic difference, Chino. So you want me to believe you aren't the goody man? Not a chance.. you're nailed and now Marissa knows the truth about you!

Ryan knew he had to get out of there before he lost it. Giving Summer one last murderous glare he turned and went out the door.

He needed to talk to Emily about this. Maybe she had some idea where her "gifts" were coming from. It wasn't too late maybe she would still be up. He'd just drive by on the way home.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Her feet were asleep again... how long she had sat there she didn't know but she was numb from the knees down. Slowly she slid up the wall and stood up. As she wiggled her toes and worked her feet millions of pins and needles danced up and down her legs. From somewhere down the hall she heard a door open and footsteps coming her way. She knew there were security cameras but it was far too dark for anyone to be seen. Suddenly what little light coming from the exit light was completely blocked as a large object stood in front of her hiding place. This guy was huge! Emily instinctively took a step back. A loud crack came from under her shoe and the man whirled around. He was wearing a mask so she couldn't see his face.

_Oh Emily, what in the hell have you gotten yourself into now? _ There was that nagging little voice that could always be counted on to point out when she had royally screwed up.

He turned to run and dropped the rose.

**Emily**: Wait! Who are you?

Before she realized what she was doing Emily was bounding after him. She paused only a second to flip the light switches on. At the stairs he unexpectedly stopped and she almost collided with him. She felt hands lift her up and then she was flying until she hit a row of lockers. He wheeled around, opened the stairwell door and was gone. Emily was too dazed to move.

_Someone should slap her for being such an idiot. What had she hoped to prove anyway_? She felt blood running down her face and there was a terrible pain in her side. Slowly she got to her feet and held onto the lockers till she could stand. As she looked at the door where he disappeared she saw something on the floor. An envelope.. probably her poem. She shuffled over and bent to pick up the envelope. Everything went black.

She opened her eyes as she was being lifted into the back of an ambulance.

**Emily**: What happened?

**Attendant**: Lay still... you have a head injury and maybe some broken ribs. We're taking you to the hospital.

The next time she opened her eyes she was in ER and two policemen were standing over her. They wanted to ask her some questions and she was more than willing to answer them. Dr. Kim was there. She spoke in hushed tones to the police then came over to Emily.

**Dr. Kim**: We will not be filing criminal charges in your case. It will be handled within the school. The doctors tell me you should rest a few days. Therefore I'll expect you in my office at 8:00 Monday morning to discuss this.

**Emily**: Yes, Dr. Kim

Dr. Kim smiled and patted her on the arm and was gone.

Emily knew nothing more until her eyes opened that evening.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

"I need the rest of my money. That bi tch was waiting in the school tonight and she saw me. I don't think she can id me but I'm not taking any chances. I dropped the pictures too so someone is gonna make a connection. I gotta get outa town for a while."

The man the intruder was talking to eyed him angrily.

From his desk Caleb produced a stack of bills and handed them to the man.

**Caleb**: I expect you gone as of 2 hours ago and let me remind you, "we have never met".

Nodding his head the man fled through the door.

Caleb stared into the dark for a long time. _What was it going to take to get Ryan out of Marissa's life and_ _ergo Julie off his back?_ Shaking his head he poured another drink. _Oh well, back to the drawing board._


	14. Chapter 14

When she opened her eyes the first thing Emily saw was a worried Ryan.. Seeing her eyes open Ryan smiled.

**Ryan**: Welcome back.

**Emily**: Have I been gone long?

**Ryan**: A few hours...you had me worried.

A smile spread across Emily's lips.

**Emily**: Don't worry.. word has it I will do anything for attention. When can I get out of here?

**Ryan**: They said as soon as you woke up and felt like it.

**Emily**: Then why am I still here? I hate hospitals.

Ryan pushed the button to call for a nurse.

After she was dressed and the papers signed she was wheeled to the car.

**Ryan**: I'm taking you home with me.. Kirsten insisted. That way we can keep an eye on you.

**Emily**: I'm ok. You guys don't need to do that. Just drop me off at home.

**Ryan**: "I said "Kirsten insisted". Have you ever seen a mad Kirsten? "He allowed a shudder to pass through his body. "It isn't a pretty sight. And she would do really bad things to be if I show up without you."

She couldn't help but laugh.

**Emily**: Ok but only to save your miserable hide.

As he helped her into the car she sought his eyes.

**Emily**: Thanks for being here.

**Ryan**: Anytime...

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Being at the Cohen house reminded her so much of the old days with her mom, dad and Emmet. She hadn't been in a real home in a very long time.

It was after dinner and Sandy was filling her in on all of the things that had been discovered while she was "getting her beauty sleep', as Ryan put it.

**Sandy**: The police have the pictures, the rose and a piece of a poem, and the film from the security camera. When Ryan heard of the pictures he told the police Marissa had been talking about pictures she had been given. When they checked it out, all of them had been taken with the same camera. No fingerprints have been found on anything.

**Emily**: Wait a minute.. what pictures?

**Sandy**: Of you and Ryan...someone apparently was following you and taking pictures. They were sent to Marissa. She even received phone calls filling her mind with lies about you and Ryan. There is no clue who is behind this... who could possibly benefit from this type of activity? The pain they caused that poor girl.

Emily looked at Ryan.

**Emily**: Did you get it all straightened out? Is she ok?

**Ryan**: We're getting there...

**Kirsten**: Emily you look worn out. Let me show you to the pool house before you collapse. If you let them, these men will keep you here all night chewing over every juicy detail... they're like a pack of little old women with this.

Inside the pool house Kirsten showed Emily where all the amenities were located. Ryan had stopped and helped her gather a few clothes on the way here. Her pack had been brought out and was lying on the bed.

**Kirsten**: Anything you need, don't hesitate to ask.

**Emily**: Mrs. Cohen, I really appreciate you hospitality. You have a lovely home and family.

Kirsten chucked.

**Kirsten**: Oh honey, call me Kirsten. Mrs. Cohen is my mother- in- law

**Emily**: Thanks... Ryan and Seth are very lucky.. I'll make sure they know it too.

**Kirsten**: I'm gonna like you.

Laughing they both said good night. Emily took a pain pill and hardly moved until late the next morning.

Ryan sat in the waiting room. He wasn't sure what he was going to say...what could be said.

The door opened and Marissa appeared. She came directly where he was sitting.

**Marissa**: Let's go out side. They have a really nice visiting area out there and it looks like a beautiful day.

Smiling Ryan stood up and took her hand.

**Ryan**: Sounds like a plan to me.

They were silent for a while after they sat down. Both of them lost in the charade of studying the landscape.

Finally Marissa broke the silence.

**Marissa**: How is Emily?

**Ryan**: She's good. When I left this morning she was still crashed.

**Marissa**: Does she have any idea what happened?

**Ryan**: Sandy was telling her all about it last night after I brought her home from the hospital. Until then the only thing she knew was some weirdo was leaving roses and poems on her locker.

**Marissa**: Did she mention what she was doing in the school?

Ryan chuckled and shook his head.

**Ryan**: You have to know Emily to understand that. She wanted to know who was doing the flower thing so she waited to find out. She is too fearless for her own good.

**Marissa**: You really like her don't you?

**Ryan**: Yes I thought that was obvious.

**Marissa**: Is she going to stay in Newport?

**Ryan**: Marissa, where is this going?

Marissa looked down at her hands.

**Marissa**: I love you Ryan.

Looking up to meet his eyes tears flowed down her face.

**Ryan**: What do you want me to say? What do you expect me to say? I can give you some slack because of your presence here but it is just like Oliver all over again. I'm the one you didn't believe.. again! I did nothing with Emily that I would be afraid to tell you about.

His voice trailed off and they were silent again.

It was Ryan that broke the silence this time.

**Ryan**: Are you getting a pass for this weekend?

**Marissa**: If you want me to.

**Ryan**: Of course I want you to. Think of what you want to do, ok?

**Marissa**: Hey, maybe Seth and Summer can join us and we can do something fun. Would Emily want to go to?

**Ryan**: I doubt it. She is tough but she got pretty broken up. We can ask though.

They continued their visit but things didn't feel the same between them.

When their time was up they walked hand in hand inside. Ryan softly kissed her and then she was gone behind the door.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Kirsten insisted Emily stay with them at least till the end of the week. Having so much down time gave Emily an opportunity to think, all of which was not a good thing. Ryan and Seth kept her entertained when they weren't in school and they brought her schoolwork home so she wouldn't fall behind. Just as she was finishing a particularly long and dull history read a soft knock sounded at the door. Ryan's head popped in.

**Ryan**: Are you decent?

**Emily**: As decent as I on in

**Ryan**: How ya doing?

**Emily**: If I was any better, I couldn't stand it.

Ryan rolled his eyes and flopped on the foot of the bed.

**Ryan**: We haven't talked much and I believe you have an a$$ chewing coming...

**Emily**: Really.. how so?

**Ryan**: What were you thinking that you decided to hang around and find out who the flower guy was.. and by yourself to boot. Things could have turned out a lot worse than they did... and why didn't I know about the flower guy?

Emily knew all of this was because he was "after the fact" scared. He was right.. it could have been much worse. Knowing this didn't keep the anger from coming into her voice.

**Emily**: Excuse me?

**Ryan**: You could have been killed!

She leveled her eyes straight into Ryan's.

**Emily**: So what's your point?

**Ryan**: What's my point? My point is it was stupid! And I would still like to know why you didn't tell me about it.

**Emily**: How about it wasn't any big deal and you had your hands full.

**Ryan**: I would have made room..

**Emily**: I didn't want you to make room. I didn't want you that close...

Just then Kirsten appeared in the doorway announcing tonight's takeout had arrived. Emily was up and gone before Ryan could say a word.


	15. Chapter 15

Emily's mind was a whirl with conflicting emotions, all of them vying for control. She had managed to avoid being alone with Ryan since their conversation two days ago but she couldn't managed it much longer. For over a year she had been running away , building up barriers between her and anything that might make her care. She hadn't wanted to feel anything ever again. A smile flirted with her lips. Moving here had been a bad mistake. She had found people she really liked and the temptation to let her guard down was overwhelming. Maybe she was healing... maybe it was time.

Her reverie was broken by a soft cough from behind her. Turning she saw Summer standing there playing with her fingers and doing that foot shuffle she did when she is nervous.

**Summer**: Hey

**Emily** : Hey

Emily had no intention of making it easy on Summer. She could understand the loyalty Summer felt toward Marissa but to say all the things she said, without proof they were true was without conscience. She had caused a lot of pain to everyone.

**Summer**: ummm can I like talk to you for a minute?

**Emily**: I'm not sure we have anything to say to each other.

**Summer**: Look I made a mistake.. I thought you were after Chino... my mouth caused a lot of trouble.. I'm umm ... sorry

**Emily**: I believed you once before, you are a pretty good liar. Why should I believe you now?

**Summer**: Look I can be a real bitch.. don't say it, I know you agree. Can we just like start over and you sorta let me prove I can be different?

**Emily**: Why would you want to?

**Summer**: Look I just do...ok?

**Emily**: Ok.. we'll give it a try on a limited basis. But I'm warning you, don't ever lie to me or pull any of your sh!t concerning me again or there will not be a hole deep enough for you to hide in. Take it or leave it...

A big smile spread across Summer's face.

**Summer**: I'll take it

They heard voices as Seth and Ryan came out of the house. Seeing both Summer and Emily by the pool the boys, wearing looks of apprehension, approached the them.

**Seth**: Summer, I waited for you after school. You didn't mention you were coming over.

**Summer**: Well, I kinda wanted to talk to Emily..

**Seth**: Yes.. and how did that go? I don't see any blood and I should think there might have been some spilt.

**Summer**: Cohen chill. Emily agrees I am a b!tch, but has agreed to overlook it on a limited basis.. right Emily?

Emily shook her head and looked at the ground as she tried to hide a smile

**Emily**: I'd say that's pretty much correct.

**Seth**: That's my Summer, mind like a steel trap. So what's the plan here. Anyone have an agenda for tonight?

As he spoke Seth watched Ryan watching Emily and Emily ignoring Ryan. Something was up but he didn't know what.

**Summer**: Hey we all should do something, after all it's Friday night.

**Seth**: That good with you Ryan?

**Ryan**: Yea, I'm cool with it. Emily?

Seth knew Ryan was not very happy with Summer right now. He had been afraid Summer had burned her bridges as far as Ryan was concerned. He was very surprised with Ryan's response, pleased but surprised.

Just as Emily opened her mouth to answer Ryan, Kirsten opened the door and yelled for help with the groceries and to announce she had brought home dinner.

**Seth**: Food! Come on Ryan, let's see what kinda goodies mom brought home.

**Emily**: You guys go ahead. I need to make a phone call... be in later

**Ryan**: Everything ok?

**Emily**: Yea, why?

Watching Seth and Summer he had to laugh.

**Ryan**: Just checking. Hurry if you expect to eat.

**Emily**: Start without me. I'm not really hungry. See you in a bit.

Ryan watched her enter the pool house. He wanted to follow her. He felt a change between them but didn't really understand what it was.

Seth was yelling from the house.

**Seth**: Hey Ryan... if you don't work.. you don't eat!

**Ryan**: Coming

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Emily looked around to make sure she had everything. She was ready. All that was left was saying thank you and good bye. She headed toward the house.

When she got there she found only Sandy and Kirsten. Looking around she saw no sign of the others. Maybe they already went out.. she hoped so..

**Kirsten**: Emily, I saved you some dinner. Ryan told me you weren't feeling too well.

**Emily**: I feel fine.. I just wasn't very hungry. This life of leisure doesn't do much to give me an appetite. Where is everyone?

**Kirsten**: They all decided since you weren't up to par they would just rent some movies and you all could just hang out here. Sandy and I are heading over to Jimmy's in a few minutes so we won't be under your feet.

Kirsten's eyes sparkled as she gave Emily a knowing wink.

**Kirsten**: I know how you kids are about having grown ups around.

**Emily**: Well, I guess it's good I caught you then. I think I'm going to go home tonight. I really can't impose on your hospitality anymore. I want to tell you how much your kindness has meant to me. You guys have been wonderful and like I said before Seth and Ryan are very lucky.

Kirsten came across the kitchen and enveloped her in a big hug. Suddenly Sandy joined them.

**Sandy**: Group hug! We really like you and we both hope you won't be a stranger.

**Emily**: Thank you. I'll take you up on that.

**Kirsten**: When will your aunt and uncle be back?

**Emily**: Who knows. When I checked messages I found a number to reach them in Russia but no mention of coming home.

**Kirsten**: Are you sure you want to go to that house all by yourself? We still have plenty of room..

**Emily**: I'll be fine, but thanks.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

When Jimmy entered the waiting room Marissa was already there and waiting.

**Jimmy**: Hey sweetie. I hurried. If you had let me know you wanted to come home tonight instead of tomorrow I would have been here much earlier.

**Marissa**: I wanted to surprise Ryan. He doesn't know.

Jimmy smiled.

**Jimmy**: This is one surprise he'll love. Got everything?

**Marissa**: All ready.

**Jimmy**: We're gone.

Arm and arm there headed for the car.


	16. Chapter 16

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC

"Beam me up Scotty" borrowed from Star Trek

The night was beautiful. A full moon hung heavily in the sky, lighting the grounds like a spotlight. Emily sat on the soft grass staring at the man in the moon and wished he would take her away. _Beam me up, Scotty. _ Sighing she got up and headed for the pool house. She needed to get her things and head home.

As she turned, rustling sounds came from the bushes. Startled, she let out a small yelp. Laughter accompanied Ryan as he stepped out of the shrub.

**Emily**: Atwood! Is it your intention to give me cardiac arrest? One of these days.... Did you get your movies?

Ryan: Yeah, Summer and Seth are arguing about which one to watch first.

Still chuckling he came closer until he was close enough to take her in his arms. The smile faded from his face as he softly slid his hands around her waist. She saw the moonlight dancing in his blond hair. Shadows covered his face so she could not read his eyes. Her mind was racing. _She should move away... why wasn't her feet moving... this should not be happening. _ Slowly he lowered his face toward hers. At the last possible second she finally got her body to respond and she lowered her face.

**Ryan**" Just once.. just once", he murmured.

She lifted her face and met his eyes. This time she could read his eyes very well but before his mouth could claim hers she pressed her fingertips to his lips.

**Emily**: Can't do it...I'm afraid it might be like those potato chips.. can't have just one...

Her voice was a strained whisper and her tears threatened to spill over.

**Ryan**: And the problem with that is?

Emily searched his face for a moment before she spoke.

**Emily**: Atwood.. I think I could fall for you... maybe some part of me already has... this has been a year from hell for everyone... hell the whole damned planet for all I know.. I don't know about you but I don't know what I feel about anything right now. Everything is all upside down and what about you and Marissa? Let's not do anything we'll be sorry for. Maybe it's our destiny to just be friends...

**Ryan**: All of these feelings I have for you aren't friendship...

**Emily**: I don't think you know what they are and neither do I.

She broke the circle of his arms and stepped away.

**Emily**: I'm going home tonight. It's time. I 'll see you at school Tuesday if the doctor releases me.

She turned toward the pool house and felt his hand on her arm.

**Ryan**: Wait... stay... I'll behave.

**Emily**: Dufus, it isn't about behaving.. it's just time to go home. You have issues, I have issues.. everyone has issues and it's high time I started dealing with mine.

She smiled gently at him as she removed his hand and headed to the pool house.

He let her go, knowing there wasn't anything else he could do.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Marissa changed into one of her sexiest dresses. She wanted to knock Ryan's eyes out! She took a bag with her just incase she would be spending the night. Out the door she went wearing a secret smile.

When she pulled up at the Cohen's she saw Emily's bike parked out front. Why was she still here? For a second her jealousy found its way to the surface again. _She really needed to stop thinking like that._ _If she were to get Ryan back completely she would have to act a lot different._

She parked the car and decided she would bypass the house and go straight to the pool house and leave her bag. If she was lucky Ryan would be out there instead of in the house. She marveled at the moon.. how bright it was tonight, just like a spotlight. As she rounded the corner of the house she stopped. Two people stood together in the moonlight. Their bodies were touching and their heads were bent close together.

Marissa turned and ran back to the truck. Tears coursed down her face. She opened the back door of the truck and threw her bag in. That was when she saw the bottle... It had been here waiting for her all this time. No one had been in her truck.. no one had seen it waiting.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Ryan was still there when Emily came out with her pack.

**Ryan**: I'll give you a ride. You can pick up your bike when you are up to it.

**Emily**: No... I'll take my bike tonight.. I'll be fine.

Ryan set his jaw and started to argue.

**Emily**: Ryan, it is settled.. I am taking my bike. I already said good bye to Kirsten and Sandy so see you Tuesday. Tell Seth and Summer bye for me.

**Ryan**: Hey, it's the weekend. I'll be out to check on you.

**Emily**: No you won't. Marissa will be home and you need to be with her, end of discussion. Please don't make this harder than it has to be.

Ryan nodded reluctantly and headed to the pool house.

Her head had begun to throb and the rest of her wasn't too far behind. First thing when she got home she was taking some drugs and hitting the bed. As she came around the house, she saw a truck parked by her bike. Shit! Marissa was sitting on the seat of her bike. As Emily approached she saw the light reflected from the bottle she was rolling in her hands.

**Emily**: Hey, Marissa. Ryan's in the pool house.

**Marissa**: It doesn't matter.. I lost him.

Marissa raised her head and the naked anguish distorted her beautiful face.

**Marissa**: I lost him.... I saw you together, just now.

**Emily**: Marissa, you saw nothing because there is nothing to see.

So, what's that... flavor of the month? I thought you were through with that shit...

Marissa raised the bottle of vodka playing with the lid.

**Marissa**: I said it doesn't matter.. I love him... I could do it for him but he's gone.

The pain, frustration, anger and her mixed up emotions finally came to a head and Emily reached out and snatched the bottle from Marissa's hand.

**Emily**: What the fu ck is wrong with you? Are you totally gutless? Can't you do anything just because it needs done?

Waving the bottle in Marissa's face she continued her tirade.

**Emily**: You say you love him... well how much? How much do you love him? Enough to drag your sorry a$$ out the bottom of this bottle? Enough to continue getting help so you can be a decent partner to him? Ryan and I are friends. I had a stupid idea you and I might get to be friends too but that is shaping up to be a huge "no". And even if he was gone, why not do it for **you** or do you like the way you are?

Marissa was watching her with wide eyes. Emily opened the bottle and poured its contents onto the ground.

Leaning forward Emily looked straight into Marissa's eyes.

**Emily**: If I were you I would collect myself and go find my man. You have a lot of people pulling for you... right now I don't really see why they are bothering.. the very least you can do is try.

Emily picked up her pack.

**Marissa:** I would like that.

**Emily**: huh? Like what?

**Marissa**: If we could be friends.

**Emily**: We'll just have to see about that, won't we.

Marissa headed for the pool house. Emily looked after her for a moment, a tear slid down her cheek. Sighing she started her bike and headed home.


	17. Chapter 17

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC

Ryan turned at the pool house door and watched Emily leave. She didn't look back. The inside of the pool house smelled faintly of her perfume. Listlessly he wandered around the room. He finally threw himself on the bed and lay staring at the ceiling .... _the pillow smelled like her too..._ He picked up a pillow and pressed it on his face, breathing deeply. _God, he was so confused_!. He heard the door open. Thinking it was Emily, Ryan spoke in to the pillow.

**Ryan**: Change your mind?

**Marissa**: Change my mind?

At the sound of her voice he sat up dropping the pillow.

**Ryan**: Marissa! What are you doing here? I thought you were Emily.

The minute the words were out of his mouth he realized how they sounded with him lying on the bed in the pool house where Emily had been staying.

Marissa stood in the doorway, a confused look spreading across her face.

**Marissa**: Well, I wanted to surprise you.... maybe it wasn't such a good idea.

Ryan: No.. no it was great idea and I am surprised. Emily just left to go home and I thought she might have forgotten something that's all.

**Marissa**: Then it's ok that I'm here?

Getting up from the bed, Ryan walked to where she was standing. He kissed her lips softly.

**Ryan**: It's more than ok. Seth and Summer are inside, we have movies, wanna join us?

That wasn't exactly what Marissa had had in mind but after the turn of the events from the last few weeks she'd settle for it.

As they entered the kitchen they could hear Seth and Summer vying for control of the remote. Ryan laughed.

**Ryan**: Like a day care... want something to drink?

Marissa: Yeah, soda would be great.

Seth heard sounds in the kitchen so he headed in to get the others, calling out as he entered the room

**Seth**: Ryan, Emily come on. We're getting older by the minute in here.

He stopped short when he saw Ryan and Marissa turning to the sound of his voice.

**Seth**: My mistake.. Gawd, Ryan you are making me dizzy again... where's Emily? Hi Marissa...

Ryan lowered his face to hide his grin.

**Ryan**: umm she wanted to go home... she said to tell you and Summer she'd see you Tuesday at school. We were just coming in.

**Seth**: Sheesh.. and I got one especially for her! I am just so "not" appreciated around here.

He turned and headed back to Summer.

**Marissa**: Dizzy? What is he talking about?

Ryan smiled a weak smile and shrugged his shoulders.

**Ryan**: Hey... who knows .. you know Seth.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Emily tossed and turned. Earlier she though she would sleep the sleep of the dead but after an hour she was still wide-awake, in spite of the pain pill she took. At least it killed the pain she thought grimly.

_Hell with it_ swinging her legs off the bed and ignoring the stabbing pain in her side she got out of bed.

Her mind just wouldn't shut off tonight. Too many things nagging at her. Looking at the clock she discovered it was still early. Well, if she couldn't sleep she'd deal with some of those nagging notions.

It still made her a little nervous being in the house alone, even though all the hoopla appeared to be over. The police had zilch... and for all appearances the whole deal was being dropped... treated like some type of prank. Wonder what Dr Kim is gonna have to say about it come Monday morning. She had told Ryan she would see him Tuesday at school. Maybe Dr Kim would have a different idea.. maybe she was going to get kicked out. Maybe... that would solve a bunch of problems at once. She could go somewhere else, another school.. live somewhere else. She was, after all more or less on her own with her own money. The big problem there was ... she didn't want to go somewhere else.. live somewhere else or go to another school. She liked it here, at least better than anywhere else she had ever been and a lot better than most. She didn't want to even think about the Ryan issue.. that was just too convoluted and confusing. However there was something she could do about finding out who had been harassing all of them. Checking the time again she picked up the phone. A voice answered on the fifth ring.

**Emily**: Leo.. This is Emily Tate

**Leo**: Emily! My god girl how are you? Where are you?

Emily smiled to herself. It was so good to hear a familiar voice.

**Emily**: I'm good. Uncle Brad got stuck with me. How are you and Lois?

**Leo**: Aww the woman is driving me mad as usual...other than that we're good.

She laughed out loud. Leo and Lois were the perfect couple but all Leo ever did was grouse, trying to make everyone think he was mistreated.

**Emily**: Leo, I need a big favor...

**Leo**: Sure kid, what can I do?

Emily started explaining all the events that has transpired over the last 2 weeks.

**Emily**: I know it's asking a lot but I need for you to find out if anyone has been checking up on me, so to speak. Someone went to a lot of trouble to cause all this trouble and I would like to know who.

Leo was silent for a moment.

**Leo**: I'll see what I can dig up. You keep your head down and call me tomorrow on the other line, not on a cell it can be intercepted.

**Emily**: Thanks Leo.

Emily rummaged in the refrigerator until she found the last surviving beer. Maybe this would help that pain pill knock her out because she had done more than enough thinking today. She wanted oblivion. Popping the top she kicked back and slowly sipped. Unbidden and unwanted the exchange with Ryan before she left came flitting into her mind. She tipped the beer up and took large gulps. That was not something she wanted to think about right now.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

The movies were done and Seth and Summer had disappeared. Ryan busied himself with cleaning up the dishes and bottles. Ryan turned to go after more and ran into Marissa bringing in the last of the dishes.

Ryan: Oh sorry didn't mean to step on you.

Marissa: You didn't I'm ok. This is the last of them.

Setting down her load and wearing her most suggestive smile, she slid her arms around his neck and moved in close.

Marissa: Hey, when we're all done here, wanna go to the pool house?

There was very little doubt in Ryan's mind what she meant. _ Damn he had wanted to avoid this. He must be out of his mind...she was beautiful and sexy.....and he was going to tell her no. Fu ck hadn't they been here before?_

Ryan: How about we go for a walk instead. I am really stiff from sitting through three movies.

The disappointment was obvious on her face. Ryan hated that. He didn't know what else to do.

Marissa knew what was happening. She had done it again. She could feel Ryan getting further from her. _Why hadn't she trusted him? Why?_ _This was all her fault and she had no one else to blame. Somehow she had to win him back again if she could_. She looked at her watch.

Marissa: Gee, I didn't realize it was so late. I probably should go on home. Rain check on that walk?

Relief flooded through Ryan. It may just be a temporary reprieve but it was better than nothing.

Ryan: Hey, sure thing. I'll walk you out to your car.

They held hands as they walked across the yard and Ryan softly kissed her good night before she slipped into the truck.

Marissa: What do we have planned for tomorrow?

Ryan: What did you decide you wanted to do?

Marissa: Anything is fine as long as we are together... you choose

Ryan: In that case we can definitely rule out shopping.

They both laughed and he kissed her lips again.

Ryan: Call me when you want me to come over.

Marissa: night

Ryan waved as he watched her drive away but thoughts of red hair filled his mind.


	18. Chapter 18

**Jimmy**: Marissa, is something wrong?

**Marissa**: umm no Daddy, why?

**Jimmy**: Well, you have been staring into that glass of orange juice for about ten minutes.

He touched her arm and smiled hopefully.

**Jimmy**: Are you sure there isn't anything wrong, kiddo?

Tears had been threatening to over flow all morning and now with the care and concern her father was showing there was no stopping them.

**Marissa**: Oh Daddy... I have been so stupid! How could I have been this stupid twice?

She moved over and sat in Jimmy's lap, snuggling close like she did as a little girl.

**Jimmy**: Sweetie, what's wrong... tell me

**Marissa**: It's Ryan. First it was Oliver and I didn't believe him. Now it was all of this business with the pictures and Emily and again I didn't believe him. I'm afraid this time I have lost him for good. And to be honest I couldn't blame him.

**Jimmy**: Sweetie, you are under a lot of pressure right now... you're not yourself. I'm sure Ryan will take that into consideration. His feelings are probably hurt but I'm sure you kids will work it out. Just give him some time.

He dried her tears and held her until her sobs subsided. Their talk was cut short when her phone started to ring.

**Jimmy**: Better get that honey. That's probably Ryan now.

She picked up the phone to check the caller id.

**Marissa**: No I'm supposed to call him when I want him to come over. It's Summer.

Hey Sum.

**Summer**: Coop.. what's up for today?

**Marissa**: Actually I have no definite plans. Do you have any suggestions?

**Summer**: I know you need to spend time with Chino and all but I was hoping you and I could do some girl stuff today. I miss having you around so much. Do you think he could spare you for a while?

**Marissa**: That is an excellent idea. Do you think it's too late to get appointments at any of the spas?

**Summer**: Yes! I was hoping you would say that so I made us appointments for the works. We need to be there by 11:00.

**Marissa**: Great, just let me call Ryan and tell him he is off the hook for today and I'll be over to pick you up. See you soon.

Marissa dialed Ryan's cell. At the prompt she left her message.

**Marissa**: Ryan, Summer and I are going to spend the day together so you are off the hook unless you'd like to get waxed and ex foliated. I'll try and get in touch with you later. Love you, bye

Marissa knew the reaction he would have to her message and she couldn't help but laugh to herself.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Ryan came out of the shower to find Seth draped across his bed.

**Seth**: Ryan, I think you have dug yourself a mighty big hole.

**Ryan**: Think so?

**Seth** : Any idea what you are going to do?

Ryan sat down on the side of the bed.

**Ryan**: Any suggestions?

**Seth**: Yep, but you won't like it.

**Ryan**: Tell me anyway.

**Seth**: Emily

**Ryan**: Would you care to elaborate on that idea just a little.

**Seth**: I think you should pursue this thing with Emily and see where it goes. In my humble opinion you have castigated yourself on the tree of Marissa enough for two life times. You don't have to run out and fall in love or anything but how about a little kick back chill time? Quit being a martyr.

At those last words Ryan looked directly into Seth's eyes with such intensity that Seth thought he was about to get punched.

**Ryan**: Is that what you think I am being? A martyr?

**Seth**: Ryan, it's not your responsibility to save all of your friends. Superman has the blue leotards with the big red **S**, let him do it.

As Seth talked he played with Ryan's phone.

**Seth**:Did you know you've a missed call?

**Ryan**: Probably Marissa... she was supposed to call when she wanted me to come over.

As Ryan listened to the message relief flooded through him, then he felt guilty because he was relieved.

_Maybe Seth was right... what exactly was it he was feeling? _

**Ryan**: Hey, Summer and Marissa are waxing today. Wanna hang together?

**Seth**: Sorry dude. I have some really serious plans. Maybe you could call Emily?

Seth's eyebrows raised to emphasis his suggestion. Ryan looked at him with a wry smile.

**Ryan**: I guess I could put my leotards in the cleaners and just be a normal guy for today, huh?

As Seth headed toward the door he called back over his shoulder.

**Seth**: Be sure and tell them "no starch". That could give you one hell of a chaffed.....

His words were lost as he quickly exited, dodging the shoe Ryan had launched in his direction.

Ryan debated on whether to call Emily or not. He decided not to call for fear she would think of some reason he shouldn't come over. He'd just show up. What was she going to do, throw him out?


	19. Chapter 19

**A N. For my one and only reader. You asked when Emily would talk about herself. Ask and ye shall receive. More will be following as she opens up. Hope you approve.**

Emily surveyed the garage full of boxes. Everyone that thought of her as fearless would be so surprised to find out what a closet coward she was. God, but it was hard to think of letting go but it was long past time. _First things first... there's gotta be something to eat around here. The grocery store was definitely going_

_to be on the list for today._ _No more of those disgusting stale crackers! _

After a shower and the sad discovery the only thing in the house to eat was the stale crackers, Emily headed off to the supermarket.

She returned home with the truck full of groceries, in fact she had went a little crazy. There would be a feast fit for a king for supper. It had been a long time since she had done anything in the kitchen but heat a microwave dinner and to be honest she was looking forward to it. After putting up the groceries she threw on some old clothes and waded into the boxes.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Securing the use of the Rover for the day Ryan strolled around to the front of the house. As he approached the car he saw something laying in the grass. Getting closer he could easily identify it. He picked up the vodka bottle. Humm ... Marissa's brand and her truck was parked out here last night. He didn't think she had been drinking when he had seen her. Wonder where it came from? What difference did it make? Seth was right... there was just so much he could do. He carried the bottle to the trash can. Wiping the sweat before it could reach his eyes, he took his outer shirt off leaving only his wife beater. It was gonna be hot today.

Ryan pulled into Emily's drive and stopped short of the boxes and piles of unidentifiable stuff. Moving among all of it was Emily, sorting and grouping items, so engrossed in her work she didn't even look up. He turned of the engine and when he slammed the car door the spell was broken and she look at him. He walked toward her and for a second he couldn't tell if he had done well or made a giant blunder by coming here. Finally she smiled and she stepped around the boxes to join him.

Emily: What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be spending time with Marissa?

Ryan: Is it all right that I came by?

Now the ball was in her court. Ryan had no idea what would come out of her mouth.

Emily noticed he dodged the question about Marissa.. that was cool. The Ryan /Marissa coupling was not her concern. They could make it or break it on their own.

Emily: Yep it's ok that you're here but if you stay I'll put you to work.

Ryan crossed his arms across his chest and narrowed his eyes.

Ryan: What's it pay?

A crafty look spread over Emily's face and a smile flirted with her lips.

Emily: How about fried chicken, mashed potatoes & gravy, hot buttered biscuits, & corn on the cob for starters.

Ryan looked surprised then.

Ryan: You can cook?

Emily: Is a 500-pound robin fat? In fact I am a damned good cook. Does that surprise you?

Ryan laughed.

Ryan: It shouldn't but it does. Where do I start?

Emily: This is trash and that stuff is going to the Good Will drop, plastic bags are over there. Those boxes need to go inside so I can organize them. Sure you wanna stay?

Ryan: Home cooking.. oh yeah.

With the two of them working the piles and boxes were soon conquered.

Emily: Wanna clean up? You can use Uncle Brad's room and I have some of Emmett's clothes that might fit you. He was taller but not much heavier than you. I'm gonna shower then start dinner.

Looking down at his clothes Ryan nodded.

**Ryan**: That would be great. I feel like Pig Pen.

**Emily**: Come on, I'll show you the way.

The clattering of pans greeted Ryan when he entered the kitchen. Emily was already there preparing to get to work. He came and stood beside her. Fresh from her shower, her hair smelling of lemon, her cheeks flushed it was all he could do to keep from pulling her into his arms. She seemed blithely unaware of her affect on him as she navigated the kitchen doing several things at once. Smiling sweetly she hefted a bag of potatoes and a knife and laid them on the counter in front of him.

**Emily**: Peel please .. more tea?

**Ryan**: Yeah, thanks.

Sitting beside him she started cleaning the corn. They worked in silence, each lost in their own thoughts, listening to the sounds of cooking coming from the stove and feeling comfortably at ease.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Marissa had decided to give Ryan some room. She and Summer picked up movies and junk food, then descended on Summer's house for a sleepover like they used to do when they were younger. She called Ryan's cell but still got no answer. Leaving a message she told him where she was and he could call if he wanted. She knew he wasn't with Seth because Summer had talked to Seth just before she called Ryan. Where could he be?

**Summer**: Come on Coop, lighten up. He is wherever he is and there is no point worrying about it. You, on the other hand, are in my esteemed company, we have junk food and chick flicks with hunky dudes.. Let's just enjoy.

**Marissa**: I know, Sum. I'm trying. Oh, hell who am I kidding. I'm angry because he wasn't waiting for my call. I figured he would be by the phone and instead I have left two messages today and not talked to him once. Do you think this is really the end of us? Tell me the truth...

**Summer**: I don't know Coop. He was really really hurt...angry too but I think he was hurt more. Maybe you should concentrate on getting better, then think about getting Ryan back.

Marissa was silent. When she spoke again, it was in a whisper.

**Marissa**: I don't know if I can do this, Summer. Not just because of Ryan. I am so afraid... I'm afraid I'll find out I'm worse than I thought... less than I felt I was... Emily asked me if I liked the way I am.

She looked away as tears fell down her cheeks. Her voice grew hard and full of anger.

**Marissa**: I hate the way I am... I hate myself!

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Dinner done and the dishes in the dishwasher, Ryan and Emily adjourned to the living room and the boxes.

Emily began sorting and searching as Ryan watched.

He saw a stack of pictures lying by a box. Bending he picked up a copy of the same one he had seen in the house the first time he had been here. A man, woman, a boy he assumed was her brother and Emily.

**Ryan**: You don't take after your parents much.

Turning to see what Ryan was talking about she saw the picture in his hand. She knew what picture he was holding. Leaving her task she went to another box and lifted out some other pictures. Sorting through them she chose one and approached Ryan, holding this new picture out for Ryan to take.

**Emily**: Actually, this is my father. Robert Tate adopted us when he married my mother.

Ryan studied the photograph. Here he could see family resemblance. Emily's green eyes looked back at him from her father's face. He was a tall well-muscled man as were the men he stood with. They were all wearing uniforms and were surrounded by sandbags. Ryan looked questioningly at Emily. He really wanted to ask her about her life but didn't want to push.

Emily met his eyes, smiled and seemed to come to a decision.

**Emily**: That picture was taken in Vietnam sometime in 73. He did almost three tours and was there for the fall of Saigon.

Ryan still holding the picture sat down hoping she would continue. She sat down beside him on the couch.

**Emily**: I was always a Daddy's girl. Emmett was closer to Mom. Dad was gone a lot. After Nam there was uncounted trips into dirty little third world countries , most of it before I was born and at the least before I could understand what was going on. He just couldn't get enough... Beirut.. Panama.. Desert Storm. He was GI Joe incarnate. I guess Mom finally got enough and told him if he wanted his family he would I have stay in the states. So he did. He was never happy... he transferred time and again. We moved so much Emmett and I gave up making friends, there was no use. Mom hated living on base.. hated the "canned houses" so we unusually lived off base.

Ryan listened with wrapped attention, watching her face as she talked. Her eyes were looking far away at things he couldn't see and her mind was walking backward in time.

A soft chuckle came from her lips.

**Emily**: We lived in this one place for a while.. god was it bad.. there was a little man down the road that got drunk 2 or 3 times a week and drove his tiller up and own the road in the wee hours of the morning. People would call the cops but by the time they showed up he and his tiller were all tucked away.

Mom was trying to talk Dad into retiring. He had been in since he was 17, the Corp was all he knew. I was 11 years old when I came home from school one day and found my Daddy with his brains splattered all over the living room wall.

Silently tears fell down her face. She looked into Ryan's face.

**Emily**: On the coffee table in front of him was a note that read "Please don't hate me Emily. I'm sorry."

They were both silent for a time. Ryan because he had no notion of what he could say to her. Emily was still lost in time with her thoughts.

**Emily**: I blamed my mother for a long time. In fact I hated her. I didn't know about the dreams, mental anguish that had become a part of his life. I didn't understand then what Delayed Stress Syndrome was.

Emily faced Ryan.

**Emily**: Got more than you bargained for didn't ya?

**Ryan**: I wish I knew what to say...

**Emily**: You don't need to say anything. I just wanted you to know.

He held her in his arms until sleep claimed them both.


	20. Chapter 20

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

**A/N To me, I had this Chapter about 2/3 in the can when I read your review. I agree with you about it dragging on. Intense blond moments, which induced severe waffling in the author, created a lack of direction for our hero. I finally resorted to the old eeny meeny minny moe routine (not really but close) LOL Thanks to you guys for doing reviews. Please let me know what you think**.

Emily woke up hanging half of the couch. If it wasn't for Ryan's arm she would be in the floor. Very slowly she slid out of his arms and moved away. He murmured something and then went back to sleep. She stretched and turned trying to relieve some of the kinks from her unusual night's sleep.

She had gotten distracted and had forgotten to call Leo yesterday. Going into the kitchen she dialed his number.

**Leo**: Hello

**Emily**: Leo. It's Emily. Sorry I didn't get you called yesterday.

**Leo**: Hey girl Just as well. I didn't have anything concrete until last night. I have a name, an address and a phone number. I also have a PI license number, a picture and a phone log of all the calls to and from the office over the last month. It is incredible what these computer geeks can find out and they hardly even get up from their desks. Too bad your Pop and I wasn't smart enough to get in on that.

Emily laughed. She really missed Leo.

**Emily**: You guys wouldn't have been happy sitting behind a computer and I know it, so save your breath. You're totally hands on.

Ryan wandered into the kitchen and straight to the coffeepot. Adeptly he measured and poured then stood back with satisfaction and watched the magic happen. Looking over at her he mouthed "good morning".

She smiled and nodded.

**Leo**: You got a fax there?

**Emily**: Yep Uncle Brad has one. Let me get the number. Hey Leo, how about sometime soon I come out and see you and Lois? It's been too long.

**Leo**: Make it soon kid. We really miss you.

**Emily**: Here ya go... 949-644-1111 Thanks, Leo. You're brilliant. I'll call soon.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

When Summer woke up she saw Marissa was already awake.

**Summer**: Hey Coop, what are you doing awake? It's like 7:00 Sunday morning.

Marissa's beautiful face was haggard and she looked like she'd had a real rough night.

**Marissa**: I couldn't sleep. All night I wanted to go down stairs and get something to drink, but I didn't. I couldn't turn my mind off. I just feel so lost and angry. Dr. Meuler says that will go away. I came to a decision... I am going to do everything Dr. Meuler tells me to. I really don't like the way I am and I have to do whatever it takes to change it.

A big smile spread across Summer's face. She reached up and hugged Marissa tightly.

**Summer**: So what is the next step?

**Marissa**: The next step is I get my head out of my ass and get straight. Do you have Emily's cell number? I 'd like to see her before I go back.

**Summer**: No but I bet Chino does.

**Marissa**: Well, I haven't been able to get hold of him at all.

**Summer**: So what's the deal with you going back? I mean, can't you stay out here and just see a shrink? I am so bored with you gone.

**Marissa**: I won't be inside much longer but I'm not ready for out here. And I sure as hell don't want to go home to my Mother and Caleb Nichol.. If it hadn't been for Emily, I would have been drunk the other night instead of watching movies with you guys. I almost lost it. Do you suppose Seth would have her number?

Summer: He might. Call him and see. We got any of that pizza left?

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Emily entered the kitchen carrying a stack of pages from the fax machine. Ryan was sitting at the table with his second cup of coffee.

**Emily**: Do you always get up this early?

**Ryan**: Frequently... you?

**Emily**: Not often. I'm not really into mornings that start before noon.

A wry grin reached Ryan's mouth and he eyed the stack of paper.

**Ryan**: Ok, I'll bite.. what's going on?

**Emily**: Does the name Henry Webb ring a bell with you? Do you think you should call home?

**Ryan**: Nope, should it? And nope, I just got off the phone with Seth. I'm covered.

**Emily**: That may be the flower guy.

Ryan came to attention in his chair.

**Ryan**: Who Seth? Seth may be the flower guy?

Emily rolled her eyes.

**Emily**: It's too early, Atwood.

Ryan chuckled.

**Ryan**: Where did you get that?

**Emily**: A friend of mine.

**Ryan**: How did you get it when the cops can't.

Emily smiled.

**Emily**: The cops don't have Leo.

Ryan took a deep breath and just looked at her.

**Ryan**: Hold that thought for a minute. We need to talk.

**Emily**: We are talking. What do you want to talk about?

**Ryan**: Us and don't say there is no us because I'd have to argue with you. We are good together in a way I have never been good with anyone before. It just works. Regardless of what you tell me I am going to break it off with Marissa. I'm tired of kicking a dead horse. It's just the same story on a different day. I screw up then she screws up and it's a viscous cycle. I wanted it to work because it was the first real relationship I have ever had. Now I realize that is a lousy reason for wanting it to work.

**Emily**: I don't know what I'm supposed to say.

**Ryan**: Just tell me if you want to try this with me.

He looked straight into her soul with those piercing blue eyes. How could she fight against that? Did she want to? Emily crossed her arms over her chest and narrowed her eyes.

**Emily**: What does it pay?

He opened his arms and she was in his arms a heartbeat later.

**Ryan**: It's about damned time!

His lips finally found hers and the kiss was worth everything second they had spent waiting for it.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Seth had sneaked out and unmade Ryan's bed so it looked as though Ryan had been home last night. If his parents woke up before Ryan got home his plan was to pretend Ryan had gotten up early and left again. Darn good plan, in his opinion. A smug look covered his face. Ryan and Emily.. looks like something just may come of that. He took great pride in his handling of that situation. The ring of his cell phone brought his mind back to the pool house. It was Marissa. Should he answer it? Sure he should.

**Seth**: Hey Marissa, how ya doing?

**Marissa**: I'm good Seth. How about you?

_Seth wasn't sure what he would say if she asked for Ryan but he figured something would come to him ._

**Seth**: Never better..

**Marissa**: Hey, do you have Emily's cell number?

_Now why would Marissa want Emily's number?_

**Seth**: Yep sure do.. you need it?

**Marissa**: Please.. I need to talk to her before I go back this afternoon.

_He hoped Marissa knew what she might be getting into._

**Seth**: Just a sec.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

She sat on his lap while they looked over the picture.

**Ryan**: Does that look like the guy?

**Emily**: All I saw of that guy was he was huge even in the dark. This guy pulled me up in a database and accessed information about me. Why would a total stranger do that? It's all linked together you, Marissa, Summer and me.

Ryan kissed her softly

**Ryan**: Jump up . You cooked dinner so I'll get breakfast.

**Emily**: I do love a liberated man. Division of labor is a good thing.

Kissing him on more time she let him up and moved over to a chair continuing her hypothesis.

**Emily**: I think Summer was just coincidence. She saw me getting roses and since she already thought I was after you, she assumed they were from you and she told Marissa.

Emily dialed the number Leo had given her for the Private Investigator. She got a recorded message saying he would be out of town for a while but would be checking for messages. Blah blah blah So what's new?

Can't anything ever be easy?

She reached for the phone logs and began scanning the list of in coming and out going calls. She suddenly stopped, so surprised she almost didn't trust her eyes. Oh my god... how could that sorry bastard do such a thing. Glancing at Ryan she decided to keep her discovery to herself for while. Laying the papers aside, she called to him.

**Emily**: Need some help over there?

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

****

**Emily**: Go on home before you get into trouble. I'll get the dishes.

**Ryan**: Trying to get rid of me already huh?

**Emily**: I was trying to be stealthy about it but you guessed it. I have my usual 9:00 coming over and how can I ever explain you being here.

Ryan chuckled.

**Ryan**: You are such a smartass.

**Emily**: Like I am the only one here that can fit that description!

Coming close she slid her arms around his waist and planted a soft kiss on his lips.

**Emily**: Now, go! Call me later.

**Ryan**: I don't think I can get very far on that tiny little kiss. You'll have to do much better than that.

Tightening her arms she snuggled his neck.

**Emily**: I can do that.

Just as their lips met the sound of a cell phone split the air.

**Ryan**: Must be you... mine is off.

**Emily**: go.. I'll talk to you later.

One more quick kiss and he was going out the door as she answered her phone.

**Emily**: Hello

**Marissa**: Emily, this is Marissa. Did I catch you at a bad time?

**Emily**: No actually you are saving me from a pile of dirty dishes.. what's up?

**Marissa**: Could we get together today before I go back to the hospital?

Emily didn't know whether to be happy or sad. She wanted to see Marissa but what did Marissa want to see her about? There was the Ryan issue but that was between Ryan and Marissa. She wasn't getting into that.

**Emily**: Sure... I'll be home all day. Do you know where I live?

**Marissa**: Yeah, I think I can find you.

**Emily**: Come whenever you want.

**Marissa**: See you in about an hour then.

Standing under the cascade of hot water Emily let all thoughts dissolve as she surrendered to the to the pulsing ministration of the shower. The combination of sleeping wrapped around Ryan on the couch and all of the nervous tension her body had been under had all of her muscles knotted tight. Mentally she coaxed the to relax.

Out of the shower she felt relaxed and focused, a definite improvement from the last few days when she had felt like she couldn't find her own ass.

Grabbing a cup of coffee, _yum Ryan makes good coffee,_ she settled down with the stack of papers that had been faxed to her. Going down the list of phone calls she highlighted each instance of one particular phone number. She needed to be careful but after she talked to Marissa she would have a better idea of what she was going to do.

Her mind wandered from the papers and Ryan danced into her thoughts... what a strange turn of events. For the first time in a long time she felt really connected with the rest of the world. She was ready to let go, to move on and heal. She felt it now in every cell in her body. It didn't matter what happened tomorrow or the next day, there would be no more walls. The past didn't matter. She alone was responsible for the rest of her life and what she did in it. She shivered with a mixture of fear, anticipation and excitement.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Ryan came through the house and everything was quiet. Smiling he gave thanks that weekend mornings were slow starting at the Cohen hacienda. Grabbing a soda from the refrigerator he headed to the pool house. Peeking in the window he saw Seth decorating his bed as he sprawled among the piles of comic books he was reading. Ryan paused a second to just watch Seth. How much more like a real brother Seth is than his own blood brother could ever be. And how much more like his family the Cohens are than his own blood family. A short amount of time can certainly make a huge amount of difference. As if sensing his presence Seth looks up and sees him. Seth's face lights up with greeting.

**Seth**: Ryan, you're back. Ok, spill it... tell me "e v -e r- y- t h i n g."

**Ryan**: What happened to my bed? Did you sleep out here last night?

**Seth**: No dude it's part of your cover. If Mom and Dad discovered your absence I was going to tell them you had gotten up early and left again. Crafty huh? So don't change the subject. Are you and Emily an item?

Seth now perched on the edge of the bed with all the air of a child waiting for his favorite story. Ryan smiled and just looked at Seth. Seth was such a part of him... the relationship was so complex he didn't quite understand it all but he knew in some integral way he and this young man were welded together.

**Ryan**: Yes, Emily and I are officially an item.

**Seth**: And...... is there something else you might like to say?

Ryan looked blankly at his friend. Finally the look of expectation on Seth's face gave him the clue he needed.

**Ryan**: Oh yeah, thanks you were right. Is that what you wanted to hear?

**Seth**: Music to my ears. So often I cast my pearls before swine and they go unheeded..

A "Ryan glare" silenced his ramblings.

**Seth**: Ahem... so what about Marissa? By the way she called here wanting Emily's cell number. Did she call?

Raising his eye brows Ryan eyed Seth.

**Ryan**: Marissa wanted Emily's number? What for?

**Seth**: Well, gee Ryan she didn't call to confide in me she just wanted the number, so I gave it to her.

Ryan pulled out his phone and turned it on. Checking he found six messages from Marissa. He had figured she would try to call and he hadn't wanted to talk to her. Wishing now he had left the phone on he listened to the messages with trepidation. He sighed with relief, nothing dyer but he probably should call her. They needed to talk but he wasn't looking forward to it and he had no idea how he should say what needed to be said. Dialing the phone a little part of him secretly hoped she wouldn't answer.

**Marissa**: Hey Ryan

**Ryan**: Hey. How ya doing?

**Marissa**: Good... umm really good.

There was a tone to her voice that surprised Ryan but he couldn't really zero in on what it was..

**Ryan**: Really?

**Marissa**: Yeah really. I would like to talk to you about it. Could I persuade you to drive me back to the hospital tonight? Maybe we could have dinner on the way?

**Ryan**: Yeah that works for me. What time?

**Marissa**: Is six-ish ok?

**Ryan**: Sounds great. See you then.

Ryan hung up the phone and looked at Seth. Something was very different.

**Ryan**: Are you sure Marissa didn't say anything when you talked to her?

**Seth**: No man, I mean I'm sure... why?

**Ryan**: Not sure but I think something is up.


	22. Chapter 22

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

Chapter 22

Emily opened the door to see a weary looking Marissa standing there.

**Emily**: Hey Marissa. Come on in.

**Marissa**: Thanks.

Smiling she entered the door and looked around.

**Marissa**: Great house.

Emily chuckled.

**Emily**: Thanks it's my Uncle's. I own the backpack in my room.

**Emily**: Can I get you something to drink.. I have soda , juice

Marissa spied the bottle of water in Emily's hand.

**Marissa**: One of those would be great.

**Emily**: Coming right up. Pull up a chair.

While Emily was gone Marissa wandered about the room. She noticed the pictures and strolled over to take a look. For the first time she wondered about Emily. It hadn't crossed her mind before. She picked up a picture of a man, woman and a boy with Emily. Was this her family?

**Emily**: Here ya go.

Startled Marissa jumped a little as she turned around. A self-conscious laugh escaped her lips.

**Emily**: Didn't mean to scare you.

**Marissa**: I guess I'm just a little jumpy. Thanks.

She went to the couch and sat down. Emily sat in a chair across from her a questioning smile on her face.

**Emily**: So.. what can I do you for?

**Marissa**: I wanted to thank you for the other night. I was having a really bad time and you befriended me.

Emily just sat there looking at Marissa. Marissa squirmed a little in her seat waiting for Emily to say something, fearful she had done something wrong. Emily's eyes grew hard and her voice assumed an angry edge.

**Emily**: Marissa, I need to set something straight here. I have no, I repeat no tolerance for drunks. A little over a year and a half ago the family car was struck head on by some sorry piece of shit that had to get drunk. Everyone died.. my whole.. family died. I sat in the middle of the highway, in a pool of my brother's blood and watched him die...all because someone had to get drunk. For a long time I cried wishing I had died too. What I did for you, I would have done for my worst enemy to keep them out of a bottle and off the street.

Marissa was so shocked and shamed. She looked at Emily with naked pain in her eyes.

**Marissa**: My god, I am so sorry.. Dear god...

Marissa felt like she was going to puke. All of the times she had gotten in her car too drunk to walk let alone drive came flooding into her mind. She had used alcohol as a crutch, never really thinking or caring about what she was doing. All of the days she had spent hiding in a drunken haze. Her voice was a whisper.

**Marissa**: What must you think of me?

Emily watched Marissa. The slump of her shoulders, the way she was ringing her hands, her breathing shallow gasps. She assumed a more gentle air.

**Emily**: Hey, life has lessons, shit happens, karma.. however you want to label it, we need to learn from it. We need to be strong enough to stand up and go on. I'm right in the middle of that little lesson myself.

Emily gave Marissa an encouraging smile.

**Marissa**: I can see why Ryan likes you so much.

Marissa's words twisted in Emily's gut. Ryan could say she wasn't the main reason he was breaking it off with Marissa but deep inside Emily suspected that if she wasn't involved he just might have stayed with Marissa. He may not have been happy but he would have stayed. She didn't want to see Marissa hurt anymore.

**Emily**: Marissa, can I ask you a personal question? If you don't want to answer tell me to fuck off.

**Marissa**: Sure ask away.

**Emily**: I gather you and your Mom aren't on the best terms and you hate her husband so why are you there? Wouldn't you be happier with your Dad?

Marissa looked at Emily tying to judge just how much she could or should say. Making a decision to trust Emily she began her story.

When Marissa fell silent it was Emily's turn to stare in amazement. What the hell type of mother would do that to her own kid and what kind of human would blackmail a child into living in such a situation.

**Emily**: Then Caleb basically blackmailed you into living with them. He's not into you is he? Like making passes and shit?

**Marissa**: No.. nothing like that. It makes my Mom happy to have me there so she can try and make me as fucked up as she is.

The anger boiled in Marissa's words. The hatred she felt for her mother and her situation was evident in her face.

**Emily**: So if you could, you would live with your Dad? And he would want you?

**Marissa**: For sure on both counts. I was living with my Dad until Caleb forced me to move into that hotel of horrors. Why all the questions?

Emily tried to make light of her inquires.

**Emily**: What can I say.. I am an incredible busy body that thrives on gossip. Actually I was just trying to get the lay of the land, so to speak. This conversation has fairly sapped all my strength. However, in that kitchen I have a homemade peach cobbler that is a guaranteed to restore vim, vigor and vitality. . Could I tempt you?

**Marissa**: Could you ever! I don't remember the last time I had anything homemade.

**Emily**: Shall we adjourn to the kitchen?

Sitting at the counter, eating from large bowls of cobbler with vanilla ice cream both girls cautiously shared themselves with the other. Most of the conversation centered on general subjects but a comfortable camaraderie developed.

**Marissa**: Now can I ask you a personal question?

**Emily**: Sure go for it.

**Marissa**: It's about Ryan...

Emily stiffened. She hoped it wasn't too obvious to Marissa. Damn, what was she going to say.. She didn't want to lie.. it was Ryan's place to talk to Marissa. She should not interfere.

Marissa saw Emily stiffen. That gave her part of the answer she sought.

**Emily**: Ok, so what is the question?

**Marissa**: Do you really care for Ryan and I don't mean just as a friend?

Emily sighed. There it was.. now what was she going to do with it.

Sensing Emily's discomfort and before she might feel threatened enough to lie Marissa continued.

**Marissa**: Let me explain why I'm asking. My whole life I have always been with someone. For years it was Luke. Then Ryan came along. I always leaned on them... who am I kidding I hid behind them. I used them. I don't mean I didn't care for them but I don't understand exactly "how" I cared for them. I am so confused about so much but I know I need to learn to stand on my own. There is a me I have never met. I am going to tell Ryan we need to take a break from whatever kind of relationship it is that we have. No that's not right... we need to alter the type of relationship we have. I still want him in my life but not like he has been.

**Emily**: So what does that have to do with what you asked me?

**Marissa**: The very first time I saw you with Ryan, I saw something between you two. It scared me very badly. Then when we ran into you at that restaurant and you sat with us there was no denying it. I guess that was part of the reason those pictures and Summer's stories hit me so hard. Inside I knew.

**Emily**: I don't understand.

**Marissa**: I am telling you that I have no problem with you and Ryan. It hurts a little but nothing like it should, so what does that tell you? Ryan and I have been through a lot and are still close but in a different way. We both need to move on. I really hope you and I can be friends. I mean real friends not that fake plastic version of friendship that covers this place.

Emily looked at Marissa with a growing sense of respect. Maybe there was more than meets the eye to this girl. A soft smile played on her lips.

Emily: I think I'd like that.


	23. Chapter 23

I do not own any of the original character from the OC.

Chapter 23

Ryan sat on the edge of his bed still wearing the towel from his shower. He wished this night were over. He wished he had already told Marissa what needed to be said. This was not a good time but it had to be done.

Rising he grabbed his clothes. He was just finishing when Marissa appeared at the door.

Ryan smiled. She looked tired, dark circles under her eyes colored her face but she beamed a smile back at him.

**Ryan**: Hey I'm almost ready.

Marissa came across the room and kissed him softly on the cheek.

**Marissa**: Hey, would you mind if we stayed here a few minutes.. there are a few things we need to talk about.

Knots formed in Ryan's stomach. Marrisa had no idea how much needed to be talked about.

**Ryan**: Cool. I guess we do need to talk over some things.

Marissa smiled weakly.

**Marissa**: Me first... ok?

**Ryan**: Sure..

Ryan sat on the foot of the bed and Marissa began to pace the room. Her nervousness was obvious and Ryan wondered what she had to say that was making her act this way. Something really bad must be wrong. Forgetting his unease he stood and moved into her path. Reaching out he put his hands on her shoulders.

**Ryan**: Hey calm down... just say it. It's only me, Ryan.. you can say anything to me.. you know that.

Marissa looked lovingly at his face. She could say anything to him. Some things were different but not everything. She reached for his hands and held both of them in hers. Keeping her eyes on his face she began.

**Marissa**: Ryan, I had this big speech all practiced but I have forgotten most all of it. The best way for me is just to say it...who knows maybe you'll agree with me. I care for you so much.. and I will always want you in my life but my feelings are different than before. I love you but I don't think I am _in love_ with you anymore. I am going through so much right now.. I need for you to understand.

Ryan watched the struggle on Marissa's face as she spoke. This was no act.. it was for real. In spite of the fact he had planned on saying much the same thing to her, he still felt sadness at what she was saying. They had been through so much together.. they had loved each other and now it was gone.. It hurt.

**Ryan**: Yeah, I agree with you. I didn't know that was how you felt.

**Marissa**: To be honest I'm not sure how I feel. Part of me feels one way and another feels something different. I know I cannot be with you right now but I don't want to be completely without you..

**Ryan**: Ok, we'll play it that way. I won't leave you alone... I promise.

**Marissa**: I spent some time with Emily this morning.

**Ryan**: Yeah, Seth said you called wanting her cell number.

**Marissa**: I can see why you like her so much.. and it's ok with me.

**Ryan**: What's ok with you?

Marissa flashed a knowing smile.

**Marissa**: The fact you like her so much. That was one of the reasons I wanted to see her was to tell her that and now I'm telling you.

It was hard for Ryan to meet her eyes but he did. His eyes had the look of both relief and sorrow.

**Ryan**: I never lied to you about any of it. I..

Marissa pressed her fingers to his lips to silence him.

**Marissa**: I know and I believe you. And I understand.

Marissa hugged him tight. She still felt safe in his arms.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Emily sat in the waiting room outside Dr. Kim's office. There was always public school if she got kicked out of here. She would fit in better there anyway... maybe it would be a stroke of luck if she got pitched out. Dr Kim came into the room and motioned her into the office. A knot formed in her throat. Who was she kidding?

**Dr. Kim**: Emily, please sit down. I trust you are feeling well enough to return to your classes?

Emily looked up at her in surprise. Did she say return?

**Emily**: I'm fine, really. Are you saying I am going to be allowed back into school?

Dr. Kim: We have carefully analyzed the situation. I would have like to have spoken to your family but I see you are emancipated so no parental or guardian conference is necessary. It is felt expulsion isn't warranted. However do not mistake this decision for permission to conduct yourself in this fashion again. Any further displays such as this will result in your permanent removal from Harbor. Are there any questions or comments you would care to make.

**Emily**: No ma'am. I understand completely.

Dr Kim stood and walked from behind her desk. Smiling she reached out and took Emily's hand.

**Dr. Kim**: Excellent. I am very glad to have you back.

**Emily**: Thank you.

Emily made her way to her locker and grabbed her books. She had just enough time to get to second hour if she hurried. A knot formed in her throat when she saw a piece of paper on her locker. It read" Wait here for me at lunch" and was signed with a heart. _Enough is enough. If this wasn't from Ryan she was going to go ballistic on somebody!_

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Marissa awoke rested and refreshed. She had slept the night through. She was beginning to notice the difference in the way she felt. The meds they had her on were doing their job. A quick shower and just juice and toast for breakfast. She had requested and early appointment with Dr Meuler and she couldn't wait to talk to him.

**Meuler**: Good morning Marissa. How was your weekend?

Marissa thought for a moment. How would she describe her weekend.

**Marissa**: How about I tell you about it and then you let me know?

Dr. Meuler grinned at her. This was a good sign.

**Meuler**: I'm all ears.

Marissa started from when she left the hospital and didn't finish until Ryan dropped her off last night. She made no attempt to gloss over the exchange with Emily in front of the Cohen's house. She made certain Meuler knew she had intended to get drunk and about her over night battle to stay sober at Summer's. She told him all the things she had thought about and decided. She felt like she was babbling but her desire to communicate kept her talking. When she finally ran out of words she looked expectantly at Meuler.

**Marissa**: Well, what do you think and don't give me that double talk about it's what I think that counts. I really need some guidance here. Does that make sense?

**Meuler**: It seems you have had a very busy weekend. I am very proud of you. You made several milestones. This makes me believe we are on the right track with your medications. I think you are beginning to see the benefit from it now. As to the other issues...your break up with your boy friend.

Why did you feel now was the time to do that?

**Marissa**: Dr. Meuler, my relationship with Ryan has not always been an easy one. We have caused each other a lot of pain at times. I can't deal with that now or in the near future. I don't really know who I am.

I've always been what and who everyone wanted me to be and I am angry and resentful about that. Right now I need to be selfish and concentrate on getting better and finding my way.

Dr. Meuler scribbled a few words on his pad and winked.

**Meuler**: Not too bad... I think we have spent enough time today. If I continue seeing this type of progress maybe we can revisit your desire to go home. I'll see you later in-group.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

The day was really dragging. Emily couldn't believe it was only lunchtime. At least she could see Ryan and speak of the devil there he was waiting at her locker.

**Emily**: Hey are you ever a sight for sore eyes.

Ryan leaned forward and kissed her firmly on the lips.

**Emily**: Wow getting a little public ain't cha.

Ryan grinned broadly.

**Ryan**: They can turn their heads.

Emily giggled. Ryan slipped his arm around her waist and they headed to the cafeteria.

**Emily**: Where is Seth and Summer?

**Ryan**: They had some errand they had to run. Said they would join us if they got back in time.

Is that all you're eating?

**Emily**: I'm not really hungry right now. Speaking of errands what are you doing after school?

**Ryan**: Soccer practice till five o'clock .Why what's up?

**Emily**: Oh, nothing.

**Ryan**: Are you sure? I can skip practice..

**Emily**: No you can't. I was just asking.

**Ryan**: You wanna pick me up at five?

**Emily**: Do you want me to pick you up?

**Ryan**: Yep sure do.

**Emily**: It's a date then.

Just then Seth and Summer arrived in a flurry of motion.

**Seth**: Emily, Ryan you will be so grateful when you hear what Summer and I did.

Summer stood beside him with her head nodding up and down. Ryan and Emily fell silent waiting for Seth to continue.

**Seth**: We scored ticket for all of us to _the_ _must see _concert of the year.

**Summer**: Isn't that great? We are all going to see the Vamps.

**Ryan**: Who?

**Seth**: Gawd, Ryan we have got to do something about your lack of musical sophistication. Trust me, you'll love them.

**Ryan**: I guess I'll have to trust you huh? Emily do you know who they are?

**Emily**: Are they local?

**Seth**: Not you too! Ryan is rubbing off on you. Maybe we need to get you shots or something.

Rising from the table Emily laughed.

**Emily**: I'm sure they will be great. Gotta go.. see you guys later.

**Ryan**: See you at five.

Emily didn't even go back to her locker. As soon as the last bell rang she was out the door. She had no time to waste if she was going to get back by five o'clock. Thank god she had done a recon run to locate the building. She found a parking place close. "Newport Group", impressive building.

She went straight to Caleb Nichols office and presented herself to the receptionist.

**Emily**: I need to speak with Mr. Nichol.

**Receptionist**: Do you have an appointment?

**Emily**: No but I'm sure he will see me. Tell him Emily Tate an associate of Henry Webb's is here to speak with him about urgent business.

The receptionist looked doubtful but she picked up the phone and called through. Her expression changed to amazement and she hung up.

**Receptionist**: You can go right in.

**Emily**: Thank you.

The door opened as she reached for the handle and she met Caleb Nichol face to face. He was smiling but it didn't reach his eyes, which were cold and mean. She entered his office and the door closed behind her. She could understand why Marissa was afraid of this man. She had the same feeling now as the first time that she saw a Great White Shark up close.

**Emily**: I would introduce myself to you but you know who I am, don't you. I'll get right to the point because I don't want to spend anymore time near you than I have to. Mr. Nichol, you and I are going to conduct a little business and here are my terms. You are going to allow your stepdaughter to move back in with her father where she can be happy. Since her father will need more money to take care of his daughter you are going to form a business venture with Jimmy Cooper. You will fund this venture with let's say ... three million dollars arranged where you can't touch it but he has full access. Do you have any questions?

Caleb sneered at Emily and moved to stand close. Emily wanted to run.. she could hear her Dad speaking in her ear, hold your mud now don't let him see you're afraid. Instead of backing up Emily closed the distance and came to a stop almost in Caleb's face. Caleb's face showed no surprise and Emily felt the full weight of his glare.

**Caleb**: And what makes you think I will do any of this. I'm not in the habit of bargaining with children.

Emily offered Caleb the papers she held in her hand.

**Emily**: Mr. Nichol how do you think it would look if this information were to be made public? Think of things like child custody hearings and massive child support payments. Think of the embarrassment to you and your wife... think of divorce. You may consider me a child but I assure the people that provided this information aren't. Even the police don't have this information. Now can we come to an agreement or does it get dirty?

**Caleb**: You're quite the little bitch aren't you?

**Emily**: And then some! Do we have an agreement?

**Caleb**: Do I have a choice?

**Emily**: No. You have three days to set up what ever venture you want for Mr. Cooper. You will call Marissa tonight and tell her she is moving back with her Dad. If anything goes wrong, you will see me again. And needless to say, we never had this meeting.

She was at the door when he called to her.

**Caleb**: Hey kid. Come see me when you graduate. You need to work for me.

Silently she closed the door behind her. Her legs felt like they were made from putty and she was afraid any minute they would deposit her in the floor. Now after the fact she was shaking all over. She'd rather be skinned alive than have to do that again! Hopefully she wouldn't have to.


	24. Chapter 24

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

Chapter 24

Caleb idly swirled his glass and watched the light reflect off the ice. It had all seemed so simple.. they were kids for Christ's sake... _kids! _And that Emily... what the hell was she anyway? He could not believe the turn of events in the last couple of weeks. Now he was going to have to listen to Julie because her daughter would be leaving. Maybe he should plan an extended over seas business trip that could last a few years...... Grimly he reached for the phone.

**Marissa**: Yes...

**Caleb**: Is that the way you answer all your calls?

**Marissa**: It's the way I answer all of your calls. Now what do you want?

**Caleb**: I would like to see you this evening. I imagine your father and friends will be out during regular visiting hours so I have arranged to see you before hours.

**Marissa**: Well, I don't want to see you... this evening or any other evening.

**Caleb**: You'll want to hear this, trust me. We _have _to talk this evening.

Marissa's curiosity was peaked. She hated the thought of seeing Caleb at all but could she afford not to.

**Marissa**: I guess I have no choice then do I.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Stuck in traffic, Emily fumed while the clock inched closer to five. _Relax, the world will not end if your five minutes late. _Any way she could use the time to figure out how she was going to explain all of this to Ryan...

As she pulled into the lot she saw Ryan standing out side. She parked the truck in front of him and turned off the engine. Opening the door, he climbed in and softly kissed her waiting lips. She breathed in the smell of soap and shampoo.

**Emily**: Mmmm.. You smell all clean and soapy. Sorry I'm a little late.. traffic sucked.

A wry smile creased his lips.

**Ryan**: You should have been around before the shower. Actually, I just got out here. Kirsten called.. you're invited for dinner.

**Emily**: Cool.. umm I need to talk to you about something, so now or later?

**Ryan**: Now is as good a time as any. What's up?

Emily pulled a stack of paper from her pack. Selecting a few pages she handed them to Ryan.

**Ryan**: What's this?

**Emily**: It's a list of phone calls to and from Henry Webb's office, with notations of the name of the caller or the called.

Ryan's eyes immediately saw the highlighted calls.

**Ryan**: That no good son of a bitch! Why in the hell can't he and that witch he's married to, fucking fall off the planet? He's not going to get away with this! Let's go. He's probably still at his office.

**Emily**: He hasn't gotten away with anything. It's been taken care of..

**Ryan**: Yeah, I know most of the trouble has died down but he isn't going to get away with it. You wanna drive me or do I take myself.

**Emily**: Ryan, I said it has been dealt with.

**Ryan**: Just what does that mean?

**Emily**: I went to see him. That was my errand.

**Ryan**: Without bothering to tell me?

**Emily**: Yep, without telling you. Caleb Nichol is not getting away with anything... in fact he is going to pay through the nose. But if you go stomping in there and spill all of this for everyone to see it will all be ruined and Marissa will be the big loser.

Ryan glared at her and his voice was cold.

**Ryan**: Marissa? How will she lose anything?

**Emily**: She is going to live with her father. Caleb is seeing her tonight to give her the good news.

Ryan looked at her stupidly.

**Ryan**: She's what?

**Emily**: She's going home where she can be happy or at least happier.

**Ryan**: Marissa told you, huh?

**Emily**: Yeah she did but she knows nothing about any of this and she can't find out about it. No one can. It's our little secret.

Ryan fell silent and looked at Emily.

**Ryan**: How long have you known?

Emily met his gaze.

**Emily**: Since the night I got the fax from Leo.

It was obvious to Emily that Ryan was angry with her.

**Ryan**: Why didn't you tell me?

**Emily**: I wanted to.. but first I wanted to make sure before opening my mouth.. I thought about taking you today but you had practice.. and in the back of my mind I saw you going ape shit all over Caleb Nichol.. I'm not going to say I'm sorry.

Ryan was silent as he looked out the window.. She started the truck and pulled out of the lot. She didn't mention another reason she was glad Ryan had not been with her. Caleb Nichol was the coldest man she had ever met and he frightened her. She wouldn't put much past that man if someone crossed him. She was the only person he was aware of that knew this secret and she wanted it kept that way.

Nothing broke the stony silence during the drive to the Cohen's. Emily pulled into the drive and Ryan got out without a word and headed to the house.

Emily watched him walk toward the house... "The ball is in your court", she muttered as she put the truck in reverse and drove away.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Caleb wandered around the common room while he waited for Marissa. _Really nice place.. should be for what I'm paying._

A door opened and Marissa appeared. Stiffly she walked across the room.. She stopped in from of him and eyed him coldly.

**Marissa**: So what did you need to see me about?

**Caleb**: Do you think we might sit outside?

He motioned toward the exit and stood back to let her pass. Marissa swept by him and led the way out. When they were seated she silently waited for him to begin.

**Caleb**: Marissa, I owe you a huge apology. When I more or less forced you to live with us, it was with the best intentions. I wanted your mother to be happy and that meant you needed to be with her. I see now that was a monumental blunder and I can't help but feel it contributed to you being here. I want to try and make it up to you.

Marissa eyed him suspiciously. _Did he really think she would believe this?_ _Just what was he leading up to?_

**Caleb**: I can understand your hesitance to believe me but I assure you it's true. I feel badly enough about all of this that I am going to suggest you move back in with your father.

Marissa's eyes widened in disbelief.

**Marissa**: What did you say?

Caleb chuckled

**Caleb**: You heard me correctly. I want you to move back in with your father. I think you would be much happier.

As quickly as it came to her face the smile slid away.

**Marissa**: What about our arrangement?

Caleb smiled and reached out covering her hand with his. It took all the restraint she had not to pull her hand away.

**Caleb**: Marissa, I want to make things better. In addition to you living with your father again I have a business venture that has his name written all over it and I am prepared to offer it to him. I'll be calling him tomorrow. It takes money to raise a beautiful young daughter and this opportunity looks to be very lucrative.

Marissa continued to eye him suspiciously, unable to believe this could all be true.

**Caleb**: Trust me Marissa. This will just be between you and me, just like our previous arrangement. All you have to do is call your father and arrange to pick up your things... I'll even get your mother out of the house.

**Marissa**: I feel like I am making a deal with the devil or something.

Caleb laughed heartily.

**Caleb**: My dear, I'm not as bad as all that... So we have a deal then?

Marissa nodded her head and crossed her fingers. She was moving back home!

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Marissa was sitting at the same table she had earlier shared with Caleb but this time her father sat across from her.

**Marissa**: Daddy I want to live with you again.

Jimmy stood and swept her into his arms.

**Jimmy**: That's fantastic, sweetie. I never really understood why you moved out in the first place.

She hugged him tight and a tear slid down her face. She was going home when she left here.

**Marissa**: I talked to Caleb. He said he would get mother out of the house so that you could get my things. I never want to go into that house again.

Jimmy wanted to question his daughter but decided against it. She would talk about it when she was ready. She was doing so much better... his baby was coming home!


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N Hey Me.. thanks!. You reading my mind again? LOL I have the ending all written just need to finagle everyone to the right spot so I can plug it in. Hadn't really thought about a sequel.**

**Starlette, thanks for the good reviews. I think my low number of reviews is proportional to the number of people that like my story. I don't think many do. I'm glad you enjoy it. :)**

I do not own any of the original characters from the OC.

Chapter 25

Emily didn't want to go home. She drove aimlessly, at last finding herself at the same beach she and Ryan used to frequent. She wasn't quite sure what she was feeling...if she had been wrong in the way she had handled the situation, she would be wrong if she had to do it again because she couldn't think of anything she would do differently. She idly wondered if Caleb had talked with Marissa yet and if Marissa had told Jimmy she was moving back in with him. She really should call Mark when she got home to see if she still had a job. A litany of thoughts ran through her mind in an attempt to block out Ryan and the situation. Looking up she discovered how far she had walked and decided it was time to head home.

Ryan went straight to the pool house. Tossing his pack he paced around the room, unwilling to sit still. His brain worked feverishly to digest everything Emily had told him. Caleb Nichol... nothing that low life did would surprise him. A mental picture of Emily verbally sparing with Caleb came unbidden to his mind and a soft smile played on his lips. He ached wanting to be with her but things were happening so fast. He needed to think things through.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Seth, Summer and Marissa talked animatedly about the impending move.

**Summer**: Cohen and I can go over this and week and get all of your things.. that way all you'll have to do is unpack.

**Seth**: There won't be any tools or reconstruction this time will there?

Summer squeezed Seth's bicep and wrinkled her nose.

**Summer**: No, no tools this time but there may be heavy boxes.. we better get Chino to help.

**Seth**: Very funny..I prefer to exercise my brain instead of my arms... calling Ryan is an excellent idea.. If I recall correctly I am the brains, he is the brawn and what was it you were again? Was it by any chance "the bitch"? Yes I believe it was.

**Summer** : Cohen!

**Seth**: Well if the shoe fits... and today it fits!

Summer glared at him and then she turned back to Marissa.

**Summer**: So Coop, when you getting outa here and coming home to stay?

Marissa's eyes twinkled.

**Marissa**: maybe this week if I'm lucky. Dr Meuler says I am doing so well he might be willing to try it. I'd see him twice a week as an outpatient. I should know by Friday.

&&&&&&&&&&

Emily opened the door. Sounds came to her from deep in the house, instantly her guard was up. Before she could turn and leave the sounds became more defined. She followed the clatter and at the end of her path entered the kitchen. Ryan turned to her and beamed a smile.

**Ryan**: I hope you didn't eat, dinner is almost ready.

An amazed look possessed her face followed by delight. Ryan stepped away from the stove and held out his arms. Without hesitation she moved to him. Pressing her closer, he tasted her lips.

**Ryan**: I'm not used to anyone taking charge, it always seemed to fall on me... guess I was sort of an ass.

**Emily**: I didn't mean it as taking charge exactly.. I guess it worked out that way though. Is that what upset you?

Ryan stroked her hair and appeared thoughtful for a moment.

**Ryan**: I haven't had the best luck with communication in my last relationships guess I had a little deja vou. I understand now. It just hit me a little weird at first. You did a really good thing for Marissa.

Emily smiled and tightened her arms around Ryan.

**Emily**: Caleb is slime. Marissa needs all the help right now she can get. I'm really glad you're here

**Ryan**: Yeah?

**Emily**: Yep, I'm starved and now I don't have to cook.

An evil grin spread over Ryan's face.

**Ryan**: Yeah, but you're gonna get stuck with the dishes.

Emily punched him playfully on the arm. Laughing she moved away to set the table.

**Emily**: How did you get here and how the heck did you get in?

**Ryan**: Seth and Summer were going to visit Marissa. I got a ride with them. As to getting in... Breaking and Entering 101.. I learned to look under the potted plants on the porch for an extra key. You need to do something about that... never can tell who might be inside waiting for you.

Emily: mmm.. might be some good looking blond haired hunk, huh?

**Ryan**: Or big and ugly from out recent past....

**Emily**: Good point.. no more key out front. In fact why don't you just hang on to it. How are things between you and Marissa?

**Ryan**: We're good friends.. both of us are comfortable with that. Little weird huh?

**Emily**: Not really. I think it's great but I still feel a little awkward about "us" in all of this. The way it all happened.

Ryan laughed.

**Ryan**: It is a little awkward but if you had been here for mine and Marissa's history... you didn't break us up so there is nothing for you to feel bad about. You have done nothing but good for Marissa.

Again he took her in his arms. He kissed her deeply and she melted to him.

**Emily**: I really am glad you're here.

"Me too", he said against her lips.


	26. Chapter 26

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**I do not own any original characters from the OC.**

****

**Chapter 26**

**Julie**: What do you mean Marissa is going to live with Jimmy? She's my daughter and she's not going anywhere!

**Caleb**: Juju be reasonable.. Marissa isn't happy here and in light of the situation I think a move back to Jimmy's is warranted, a fresh start for everyone.

**Julie**: Whose side are you on? I know what's best for my daughter and it isn't living with her criminal father. She's not going anywhere!

**Caleb**: Julie, do you want to lose your daughter completely? Fight her on this and you will. Give her some time....

Julie's legs gave way and she crumbled to the couch. Sobs shook her body. Caleb encased her in his embrace and rocked her like he would a child.

**Caleb**: It will be ok, Juju. We'll find a way.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Dr Meuler sat across from Marissa and had to marvel at the change in this young woman. It was like she had been reborn as someone else. He wished he could take the credit for this transformation but he feared modern medicine would be the real hero. Regardless of who would receive the credit for saving this young woman, she was indeed on her way to being saved.

**Marissa**: So how wrong am I for never wanting to see my mother again? I mean after all she has done..

**Meuler**: Marissa, your mother has made some monumental mistakes and yes I can understand you feeling you never want to see her again but can you live with that? Can you rationalize it to yourself enough to accept it or will you merely be cutting off your nose to spite your face? She is your mother... our task here is to help you deal with this not run and hide from it.

**Marissa**: I think I understand what you are saying but right now I never want to see her again...

**Meuler**: All in good time... enough for today.

**Marissa**: Wait.. I wanted to talk to you about... going home?

She looked at him with the hopeful eyes of a child on Christmas morning. "_Please_", she prayed.

Meuler chuckled softly.

**Meuler**: I was wondering if you were going to bring that up.

**Marissa**: Well?

**Meuler**: I think it is an excellent idea... why are you still here?

For a moment Marissa was so taken back, she didn't realize what he had said. Laughing and crying simultaneously, she was out of her chair and across the room. She hugged him tightly.

**Marissa**: Are you serious? I can go home?

Dr Meuler looked at her, maybe for the first time. Something wonderful had taken place here and he was very happy to have been part of it.

**Meuler**: Yes, I am very serious. I think you are ready to go home.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Ryan was sitting by the pool when he heard his cell phone ring.

**Ryan**: Hey Seth, grab that will ya?

**Seth**: Where is it? I can hear it but I don't see it? Underwear, socks, tee shirts. Jeans... ah here it is ...phone! Hello?

**Marissa**: Seth? Is that you?

**Seth**: Yes it's me... better than Ryan's underwear and that was your next choice... How's it going?

**Marissa**: Great I'm coming home. Is Ryan close by?

**Seth**: Just a sec.. he's basking by the pool.. and yes that is sarcasm if you choose to ask.

Handing Ryan his phone, Seth headed back to the house.

**Ryan**: Marissa?

**Marissa**: Ryan! Geez, I never used to have this much trouble finding you...

**Ryan**: Seth used to spend more time with Summer and less time here.. what's up?

**Marissa**: I'm being released! I get to come home!

**Ryan**: Marissa that is great! Seth filled me in on "the move".. We are going over tomorrow night to get your stuff and move it to your Dad's. Do we need to do anything else?

**Marissa**: No, if you get my stuff moved that would be heaven. How's everything with you?

**Ryan**: It's good.. really good.

**Marissa**: I'm glad.. you deserve the best. How's Emily?

**Ryan**: She's good too.

**Marissa**: I am so lucky to have you guys...

**Ryan**: And we are lucky to have you!

**Marissa**: Bye, send kisses! Love you all..

**Ryan**: Bye see you soon.


	27. Chapter 27

I do not own any original characters from the OC

**A/N Hey Me, I can always count on you LOL So you noticed they are really nice to each other.. golly do you suppose this just might create some "awkward" in the future? **

**Anna, thank you, I really appreciate your review.**

**

* * *

**

Chapter 27

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Geez, Atwood.. you're worse than a girl. If you don't get the lead out we're gonna be late.

Emily stood impatiently waiting at the pool house door.

**Ryan**: Ok..Ok I'm ready.

Grabbing his pack he led the way out of the pool house. They rounded the house to find Seth waiting by the truck.

**Seth**: Hey, can I get a ride with your guys? Mom left early and Summer isn't speaking to me. It seems I can take her from bliss to bitch is less than .02 seconds. Don't you think that might be some kind of world record?

**Ryan**: Don't let her hurt you until we get all of Marissa's stuff moved. I'm not doing all of that by myself.

**Seth**: No worries. She won't even share air with me so she won't be close enough to hurt me. I have no idea what she's pissed about.

Tossing their packs in the back of the truck they all piled in.

**Emily**: What are we moving?

**Ryan**: A shit load of clothes and I'm not sure what else... but you aren't moving anything.

**Emily**: Excuse me?

**Ryan**: You still have a couple of broken ribs remember. We've got it covered.

**Emily**: Well, I can tell when I'm not wanted...

Ryan chuckled as he slipped his arm around her shoulder and nuzzled her neck.

**Ryan**: You're wanted.. but not for moving

**Emily**: Mmmm.. now that sounds promising.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Julie almost didn't answer the phone when she saw who the caller was.

**Julie**: Yes Jimmy.

**Jimmy**: I just wanted to remind you the kids will be over after school to get Marissa's things, so be home.

Julie bit back the stinging remarks that struggled to get out of her mouth. _Who the hell did he think he was talking to?_

**Julie**: I remember and I'll be here. Are you coming with them?

**Jimmy**: No, I'm stuck here. I'm sure they can handle it.

Julie was positive she could hear the smirk on his face through the tone of his voice. She wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of showing her feelings.

**Julie**: Yes, I'm sure they'll do fine. Thanks for calling.

**Jimmy**: Sure thing.

She stood there holding the phone long after the line went dead. She felt strong arms encircle her waist and a soft tickle on her neck. Turning in his arms, she snuggled close.

**Julie**: I thought you had already gone.

**Caleb**: I decided I would stay home and spend the day with you. Maybe you could use the company.

Sobs shook her shoulders and she rested her head on his shoulder.

**Julie**: Why is this happening? All I want is for my family to be together.

**Caleb**: Shhh.. Things will calm down and we can try again. We just need to hang on.

**Julie**: I am so thankful I have you.

**Caleb**: How about some lunch. We could go down to that little sidewalk place by the dock. It will be good to get out and we'll be back in plenty of time.

She looked deeply into his eyes.

**Julie**: I love you.

**Caleb**: I love you. You have the most indomitable spirit of any woman I have ever known. I can't .. no won't even try to image life without you and I'll do whatever I have to do to take care of you and make you happy.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Seth spotted Summer sitting alone at a table, her lunch untouched.

**Seth**: Is this seat taken?

Summer looked up, wrinkled her nose then resumed arranging the uneaten food on her plate.

**Seth**: Although that answer is somewhat noncommittal, I'm going to assume that it's a "no" .

Gracelessly he plopped into the empty chair.

**Seth**: Are you gonna tell me why you are not speaking to me?

**Summer**: No.. I'm not speaking to you.

**Seth**: You just did.

Summer looked questioningly at him.

**Seth**: Spoke to me.. you just spoke to me so since you spoke to me you can tell me how I pissed you off so I can fix it.

Summer continued moving the food on her plate, refusing to meet his eyes.

**Seth**: Summer. .please tell me what I did. This hot and cold thing you're doing is driving me crazy.

Summer looked up, a single tear tracking down her face.

**Summer**: I know

**Seth**: You know?

**Summer**: "I know it drives you crazy because that is how you've been treating me since you got back and it makes me crazy," she whispered.

Seth was stunned into silence. He knew he felt and acted a little differently since his return but was he really being this bad? Inching his fingers across the table he took her hand in his.

**Seth**: Summer, I'm sorry. This has been a really really bad year and I guess it is making me an even bigger ass than I was before. Tell ya what.. tonight after we get Marissa's stuff moved we'll sit down and talk.. really talk. Ok?

Summer rapidly nodded her head and squeezed his hand. He wiped the tear away and gently kissed her cheek.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

School was finally over for the day. The student body breathed a collective sigh of relief and then descending in mass formation fled the building. Shouting greetings, laughing and yelling to one another, they piled in cars and trucks abandoning the campus.

Ryan and Seth stood waiting for Emily.

"Hey Cohen", Summer called from the doorway as she headed their way.

**Ryan**: I thought you were in the doghouse.

**Seth**: I was... hey Ryan do you ever feel your head is so far up your ass you'd need surgery to get it out?

Ryan's mouth twisted with a wry grin.

**Ryan**: Everyday.. Is that new for you?

**Seth**: No.. I was just wondering if I had company.

Summer bounced up and kissed Seth loudly on the mouth.

**Summer**: Hey Chino ..Ok guys, what's the plan? Where's Emily?

"I'm here". Emily sidled up next to Ryan.

**Ryan**: Hey, we were about to send out a search party,

**Emily**: Sorry. Dr Kim caught me and was inquiring about my injuries. So, how are we gonna do this?

**Ryan**: Kirsten said she would leave the rover at home so we could use it. With it and your truck maybe we'll just need one trip.

**Emily**: Cool.. Summer , you riding with us or did you drive?

**Summer**: I have the car.

**Seth**: Summer and I will meet you guys at the house.

&&&&&&&&&&

While Seth and Summer haggled over which cd to play, Ryan rummaged in the refrigerator for something to drink. Snagging two bottles of Gatorade he headed toward the commotion. Entering the room he called out.

**Ryan**: Hey Marissa, want some Gatorade?

The second it was out of his mouth, he knew what he had said. His mouth worked but nothing came out of it. _Oh god! Where the fuck did that come from? Marissa? Jesus... he had just called Emily Marissa! _He hesitantly looked at Emily.. Seth's face reflected everything that was speeding through Ryan's brain. The room fell dead silent.

**Ryan**: Emily, I umm I I'm sorry. Geez, I didn't mean..

Emily laughed softly.

**Emily**: Well at least you got it right the second time. I'd love some Gatorade, thanks. Hadn't we better get going?

All the way over to the Nichol's house Ryan kept waiting for the other shoe to fall, the angry tirade, maybe crying but Emily chattered about school, asked about his day, all normal stuff and gradually he began to relax a little. His monumental verbal blunder would have to be the topic of a long discussion later but right now he was relieved Emily was ignoring it. As they pulled up to the house Emily fell silent.

**Emily**: Geez, you mean Marissa lived here?

**Ryan**: Yeah, Caleb is pretty rich.

**Emily**: He can keep it.. not my taste at all.

Caleb met them at the door. Opening it wide he ushered them in and accompanied them to Marissa's room. Emily hung back by the door to wait. She looked around nervously and wished she had stayed in the truck.

Seth, Ryan and Summer went about their tasks in relative quiet. They hurried ; all of them anxious to get out of this house.

Emily migrated far enough into the house to find a chair and deposited herself there. She felt useless and completely out of place. She fervently wished Ryan would let her help. _He had called her Marissa.. it really didn't mean anything, did it? After all he was used to being a couple with Marissa and used to saying her name... it happened all the time, didn't it? She needed to stop thinking about it and put it behind her.. it was an honest mistake.. wasn't it? Enough, just stop it!_

A painting caught Emily's eye. Trying to avoid her dark thoughts she wandered over to get a closer look.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" Turning Emily came face to face with Caleb. Without realizing it she took a step back.

**Emily**: Yes, it is stunning.

Caleb wore and easy smile but his eyes were cold. Emily was reminded of a line from a child's story, something about don't look a snake in the eyes or you'll be so scared you'll be unable to run away. Right now she truly understood its meaning.

**Caleb**: Good to see you again. I trust you are on the mend.

Emily looked around but she and Caleb were alone.

**Emily**: I'm fine.

**Caleb**: I took care of all the little things we discussed at my office the other day. If you'd like to drop by I'll show you my arrangement for Jimmy.

**Emily**: Why would I want to do that?

**Caleb**: Then you trust me?

**Emily**: Excuse me? Trust you? I seriously doubt that. I don't need to come to your office.. I have other ways to get information.

Before Emily could make an escape, from out of nowhere Julie arrived.

**Caleb**: Juju, this is Emily.. a friend of Marissa's. I don't think you've met her.

Julie eyed her coldly.

**Julie**: No I don't think we have met. You must be a new addition.

_This was like tag team wrestling.! She needed a way out! _

Suddenly Emily felt a strong hand claim hers. Ryan stood beside her. She was weak with relief.

**Ryan**: I think we got everything. We'll be going now.

Without another word, they turned and went out the door. At the truck, Emily slipped her arms around Ryan.

**Emily**: Thank you.

Smiling he pulled her close, stroking her arms.

**Ryan**: You ok?

**Emily**: I am as long as we don't have to go back in there.

Ryan chuckled.

**Ryan**: Sandy calls them the gruesome twosome.

**Emily**: I think Sandy's right. God I feel sorry for Marissa!


	28. Finis

**I do not own any of the original characters from the OC**

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A/N Thanks for all that reviewed and encouraged me :)

* * *

A full table of food built around freshly grilled burgers was waiting for the gang when they arrived at Jimmy's.

**Jimmy**: Dinner is served... unloading can wait.

**Seth**: You don't have to say that twice. My stomach thinks my throats been cut.

Crowding around the kitchen sink, they washed the grime from their hands then moved to the table to lay claim on a chair. Jimmy stood back smiling at all the youthful commotion. God but it was good to have a house full of kids again.

* * *

**Ryan**: Man, I'm stuffed.. that was great, thanks Jimmy. 

**Seth**: Same here. Made all that manual labor worth while.. well almost sorta close?

Emily and Summer chimed in their mutual appreciation. Getting up from the table, Emily began clearing the dishes.

**Jimmy**: Hey, I'll do that later.

**Emily**: Please, let me help.. I'm not allowed to help move anything so at least I can load a dishwasher.

**Jimmy**: Since you put it that way... thanks. I really hate doing dishes even with a dishwasher.

With everyone working it was no time at all till Marissa's things were unloaded and deposited in her room. Jimmy looked around the room and his eyes began to mist. _His baby was coming home. _

* * *

Seth and Summer climbed into the rover. 

**Seth**: Your place or mine?

**Summer**: Mine.. Dad and the wicked stepmother are gone for the weekend. They left this morning.

**Seth**: Outstanding...

Summer came into the kitchen to find the only thing of Seth outside of the refrigerator was his butt. She could hear him rooting around, looking for god knew what because he had eaten enough at dinner for five people. This was too good and she absolutely could not resist. Quietly she crept up...

**Summe**r: GOOSE!!!

**Seth**: OW! Summer!

Seth jumped, hitting his head on a shelf and dropping the cans of soda from his hands.

Summer was laughing too hard to put up much of a fight as Seth grabbed her. He couldn't keep a straight face for long and eventually both were leaning on each other for support.

"Do you want something to drink?" he giggled.

"Yes," she gasped between peels of laughter..

* * *

Summer had beaten him again! 

**Seth**: Time out! Union break, whatever...

**Summer**: What's the matter Cohen, can't take the heat?

**Seth**: Naw, I just need a break..

Standing he stretched. It was good being here.. being with her. Turning the PS2 off, Summer came back to stand beside Seth.

**Seth**: This was a good day..

**Summer**: Yep.. God that was so sweet! Did you see Mr. Cooper was about to cry... it has sucked for so long, for so many people that this whole place should be declared a disaster area. Finally some people seem to be getting a break. I can't wait till Marissa is home.

**Seth**: It has sucked.. which brings me to the main reason I am here.

Taking her in his arms he looked into her eyes.

**Seth**: Summer, what do you want from _us_?

She was quiet for long enough Seth began thinking he might have to explain the question. Just as he was opening his mouth to elaborate she answered.

**Summer**: I want _us_ to make me be happy. I'm not happy without you but I don't want to be unhappy with you.

Seth smiled and stroked her hair.

**Seth**: Good answer.. and mine is pretty much the same. I know I haven't been the same guy since I came back. I changed in some ways and I think it has made our relationship harder. I'm sorry for that. I do still love you.. probably always will. Do you love me enough to work at getting back what we had?

**Summer**: Cohen, you idiot.. I'd crawl through hell for you. I just need to know you'll be there at the finish line when I cross it.

**Seth**: Well I'd certainly be there unless I had other pressing appointments...

**Summer**: Not now Cohen! I don't want to laugh.. I want to see your heart.

**Seth**: Summer, all you have to do is look.. my heart has always been with you.

**Summer**: Seth, I love you.. don't hurt me anymore.

**Seth**: Just don't give up on me.. or us because I love you too.

* * *

Marissa looked around at her room. She felt safe here. She felt a little panic at being at the mercy of the rest of the world. These walls kept her safe and also protected her from herself. Tomorrow her dad would take her home and she would not have these walls. It was scary but she could do it. All of her things were already packed.. she was ready. Tomorrow morning couldn't come soon enough for her.

* * *

Emily had tossed Ryan the keys when they climbed into the truck. She slid over next to him and laid her head on his shoulder as he drove. Ryan knew exactly where he was going. Lost in her own thoughts Emily didn't realize where they were till the truck came to a stop. Looking around she realized where they were. 

**Emily**: What are we doing here?

**Ryan**: It's kinda our place... and we need to talk.

**Emily**: Ryan Atwood seeking dialogue? The earth just may stop turning!

**Ryan**: Cute.. these days I feel like I never shut up.

They held hands as they walked down the beach. They were silent for a while, just enjoying the sound of the surf, the moonlight and just being together.

**Ryan**: I made a really stupid slip of the tongue earlier and I am so sorry about it I could cut out my tongue. I really need you to understand that was all it was.

Stopping he turned her to him, looking steadily into her eyes. Nervously he waited for her to say something.

**Emily**: I won't lie..it more than bothered me. Why wouldn't it? But I had a lot of time to think about how I felt about it while you guys were busting your butts and I watched.

A nervous laugh escaped her lips as she continued.

**Emily**: I don't know anything about relationships, in fact you are my first, other than my family. All the other guys have been date 'em a few times.. no big deal.

Nervously she paused and chewed her lip.

**Emily**: My Mom used to say life's too short to dance with ugly men... Translation. .life's too short to be someplace you don't want to be, with someone you don't want to be with.

Alarm lit his face at her words and he opened his mouth to interrupt. She shook her head and raised her hand for him to stop.

**Emily**: I can't do jealousy.. it just a waste of time. People should be together because they want to be and because it makes them happy. If I learned anything from losing my family, it's that all any of us really have is "_right now"_.

Ryan pulled her closer.

**Ryan:** I am right where I want to be with who I want to be with...

**Emily**: Me too, but I only want you here for those reasons... life is too short for tears and regret..

Ryan tightened his arms around her, softly nibbling her lips.

**Ryan**: So.. are things between us good?

"Way better than good", she murmured against his lips.

FINIS


End file.
